Secrets (Completed)
by MuseGoddess
Summary: Sasha's life is perfect-but when she finds that Brit and Jacob have been spending time together without her, it doesn't look good. And what's with her roomie's suspicious diary entries? Read to find out! K for Jasha (or Bracob...uh-oh!) romance, obviously.
1. Yup, She's Gone, Right?

**Okay, it's my third fanfic! I'm glad to have reached this milestone. **

**Longer summary since the other one couldn't hold too much:**

** So, the story takes place after the twelfth book in the Canterwood Crest series, which I'm sure you've figured out already. Sasha has everything-but all that slips when she realizes Brit and Jacob have been spending time together. To make it worse, Sasha accidentally reads Brit's diary, which says something about "not wanting to take him up on his offer, because Sasha would get mad." Could it be? Read to find out!**

**Read and COMMENT! I've already written three chapters but wanted to know if this fanfic is worth continuing.**

**-MuseGoddess**

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><p>Chapter One<p>

Yup, She's Gone—Right?

I scribbled down one last thing in my silver assignment notebook before hurrying out of Mrs. Utz's math class. She'd kept us in for three extra minutes before Andy had reminded her of the time. As I headed out the door, trying to cram my math book into my already-full bag, I bumped into someone.

"Whoa!" I said, grabbing onto the wall for support. Something flat and black fell from the guy's hand. He looked up. It was Ben.

"Oh, sorry," I apologized, reaching for the object he dropped. It was a phone. I started to hand it back when I saw the screen and froze. It was a picture of Julia, smiling while petting her horse Trix.

It was like I couldn't breathe. Ben grabbed his phone back and set off, cheeks flushed. I forced myself to keep walking.

Julia's expulsion had happened a mere weekend ago—which wasn't nearly enough for us (the remaining Trio, Brit, me and Ben) to get over it. Even though she'd written _horrible, _untrue things about Brit, Heather, me, Paige, the stable-wide Halloween Trail Ride—I still couldn't believe it. She was really gone.

Her room had been cleaned out, name removed from attendance sheets—it was like she'd never gone to Canterwood. What was the Trio now? The Double? I had no idea.

Orchard Hall rose into view. I pushed open the doors gratefully, blue sparkly messenger bag with adorable little heart iron-ons bumping against my leg. I hurried to the room I shared with Brit, shoving the key in the lock and tossing my bag down on my bed.

Brit jumped. She was all dressed for our riding lesson, her laptop opened on her lap.

"What?" I asked, opening a drawer and pulling out dark-blue breeches.

"Um, Julia posted something." She pulled her braid over her shoulder.

I froze. "On her _blog? _How?"

She showed me the page. The latest post had gone up about an hour ago.

I drew back. "Is it anything mean?"

"No." Brit shook her head. I leaned closer to see the white font scrawled across the page.

_To those I blogged about-_

_ Listen, I'm really sorry for all I posted. It was untrue and mean. You guys were my friends, and just because I was mad about the YENT, it was no excuse to treat you like that. I'm so, so sorry. I'm actually getting used to life at Wellington. I know you probably won't forgive me for what I did, but I had no chance to apologize before I left and had to try._

_-Julia_

I reeled back as if someone had slapped me. It wasn't the fact that she was apologizing. My finger shook as I pointed to the words, "life at Wellington".

"She's going to _Wellington _now?" I asked, horrified. "With Jasmine? How?"

Brit shrugged helplessly. I pulled out my phone and typed.

_ Did u hear abt Julia?_

I sent it to Heather and Alison. Minutes later, I got a reply from Heather.

_ To: Sasha Silver_

_ From: Heather Fox_

_ No. What?_

I logged into BlackBerry Messenger.

_ Sasha Silver: _

_ She posted a sry letter on her blog. But that's not it. She's going 2 Wellington now! With JAS!_

_ Heather Fox: _

_ U sure Silver? _

_ Sasha Silver:_

_ Sure. Look on her blog._

_ Heather Fox:_

_ Ugh. I hate that thing. U know what she put on it?_

_ Sasha Silver: _

_ 1sthand. But srsly, do it._

It took her a few minutes to reply, probably because she was looking up the post.

_Heather Fox:_

_ OMG! Do u think she'll side with JAS now?_

_ Sasha Silver:_

_ Hope not._

_ Heather Fox:_

_ We better not let that happen. That would b horrendous. J and Jas—ugh._

_ Sasha Silver:_

_ I kno. Have u talked all w/Julia?_

_ Heather Fox:_

_ No. OMG, we'll b late 4 practice! C u stable._

_ Heather Fox has left._

I exited BBM and resumed changing while Brit laced up a paddock boot. She looked at me. "Do you think Julia really is sorry?"

"I don't know," I confessed, pulling my hair into a ponytail. "She should be, after all she did. But the way she talked about the blog—it was like she worshipped it. I have no clue."


	2. Good or Bad News

**Okay, second chapter! More people should really read the Canterwood Crest series-it's ridiculous. Read and comment!**

**-MuseGoddess**

**PS-If you've read my earlier stories, you know that I like to put chapter previews below . . .**

**PPS-Pony Person92 and Author-Insomniac, thanks for pointing out the Western saddle typo. I fixed it!**

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><p><strong><strong><strong>I needed to fix something (see PPS above) so I had to fix the typo, delete the chapter, and put it back. If anyone knows an easier way to do this, do tell!<strong>****

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><p>Chapter Two<p>

Good or Bad News

I went to brush my teeth and put on some gloss before heading for the stable with Brit. We were silent as we walked over. The wind blew strands of our hair back, and I shivered.

We entered the stable gratefully. Heather was already inside, clipping Aristocrat to a pair of crossties.

I said goodbye to Brit and hurried to Charm's stall. He was eating a mouthful of hay when he looked up at me.

"Hey, boy," I said, unlatching his stall door. "We need to go. Don't want to get kicked out by Mr. Conner."

He swallowed and snorted—he was afraid of Mr. Conner too.

I led him out, and finding an empty pair of crossties in front of his stall, clipped him to them. I skipped the currycomb, instead brushing him with a dandy brush. Small plumes of dust rose into the air. I swept him over with a body brush and retrieved his tack.

Charm stood still as I spread a navy-blue saddle pad on his back before heaving the white English saddle on top. I tightened his girth as Heather walked by, leading Aristocrat.

"Hurry up, Silver," she said. "Don't be late. We're practicing in the indoor arena."

I unclipped the crossties and looped the reins around his neck. Then I held the bit on my palm, and Charm took it quickly. I pulled the crown over his ears ad led him out.

Brit and Apollo walked up to us. I let go of Charm's lead line for a second to button up my coat.

"Whoo," I said. "November in Connecticut is not picnic weather."

"Tell me about it," Brit said. "It's so unfair sometimes. I visited my cousins in California one year for Thanksgiving and when I got there, they picked me up in shorts and T-shirts."

"So unfair," I agreed, looking up at the gray sky.

We reached the indoor arena we were using for practice and entered. Heather was already there, trotting Aristocrat in large circle. I mounted Charm and joined her, urging him into a walk, then a trot.

Callie walked in moments later, and we were quiet as we waited for Mr. Conner. Soon he walked in, carrying his clipboard.

"Good afternoon." He finished scribbling something on the paper and looked up.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Conner," we echoed.

"Keep warming up, girls," he called. "I have news from Huntington."

My stomach twisted. We'd finally know if our performance at the Huntington Classic had been good enough to score the Canterwood YENT team a spot in the Essex Fall Show. My hands clenched tighter on the reins and Charm blew out a puff of air through his nostrils.

I met eyes with Brit across the arena. _I hope we make it! _she mouthed excitedly.

_I know! _I mouthed back.

We finished warming up and rode over to Mr. Conner.

"I admire all of your hard work," he began. "And remember, no matter the results, I want you to know that you tried your hardest and are all excellent riders." I could not be prouder."

I squirmed in the saddle. So he wasn't going to tell us _right_ this second! But I felt a small prick of unease. Why would he tell us this if we made it?

"And now, I would like to inform you all that based on your performance at Huntington…"

I held my breath, squeezing my legs against Charm's sides and biting my lip.

"…the Canterwood YENT team is going to the Essex Fall Show!"

"Omigosh!" Brit squealed. It took a few moments for the syllables to rearrange themselves into something I could actually understand.

"Essex! We're going to Essex!" I screamed. Callie gazed at Mr. Conner with a mix of disbelief and joy. Heather wore her I-told-you-so smirk.

I leaned down to rub Charm's neck. "Good job, boy," I told him. "Thanks to you, we're going to Essex!"

My horse gave me a look that said, _Did you really think I wouldn't make it?_

I laughed. "Not for a second."

"This will take place a week after you return from Thanksgiving break," Mr. Conner told us. "I expect you to train hard and make me proud. Which you will, of course." He smiled. "Ready to train?"

"Yes!" we all chorused.

After our lesson, I finished untacking Charm and gave him a flake of hay and checked to make sure his water bucket was full. As I said goodbye, my phone buzzed. I checked the screen and saw a BBM message from Jacob.

_Jacob Schwartz:_

_ How was ur lesson?_

I kissed Charm's blaze and typed back.

_Sasha Silver:_

_ Amazing! Just found out—we're going 2 the Essex Fall Show!_

_ Jacob Schwartz:_

_ Whoa. That's awesome! I'm so happy 4 u. Knew u would make it._

_ Sasha Silver:_

_ Thx! : ) But rlly, it came as a surprise._

_ Jacob Schwartz:_

_ Shouldn't have. Ur a great rider, Sash. We should go out to celebr8._

_ Sasha Silver:_

_ I'd 3 that._

_ Jacob Schwartz:_

_ Meet u the Slice 6? We could go 2 the Sweet Shoppe or media center 4 movie r._

_ Sasha Silver:_

_ C u there!_

I exited out of Messenger, stopping by the stable bathroom to wash my hands and reapply some gloss. Then I hurried out across the courtyard, pulling my red coat tighter around me.

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><p><strong>So, how'd you like it? Comment! By the way, here's a chapter three preview . . .<strong>

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><p>Chapter Three<p>

The Butterfly Thing Never Gets Old

I let myself gladly into Orchard just as a strong gust of wind blew by me, sending leaves sailing into the sky.

I shut the door gratefully and weaved through the students passing me in the cranberry-colored hallway. I made my way to my room where Brit sat on her bed, pulling off my gloves and stuffing them in my pocket.

"I can't decide which shirt goes better with this skirt!" Brit said. "Which one will Andy like more?"


	3. The Butterfly Thing Never Gets Old

**Thanks for all your reviews! I fixed the typo. So, this is basically a classic Jacob-Sasha date chapter. Enjoy!**

**Read and comment! I'm going to die without reviews!**

**Chapter Four preview below.**

**-MuseGoddess**

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><p>Chapter Three<p>

The Butterfly Thing Never Gets Old

I let myself gladly into Orchard just as a strong gust of wind blew by me, sending leaves sailing into the sky.

I shut the door gratefully and weaved through the students passing me in the cranberry-colored hallway. I made my way to my room where Brit sat on her bed, pulling off my gloves and stuffing them in my pocket.

"I can't decide which shirt goes better with this skirt!" Brit said. "Which one will Andy like more?"

I stopped as I replaced my paddock boot for slippers. Her date with Andy was tonight. I walked over and looked at her choices.

She had a navy-blue skirt and black leggings on her lap. Beside it was a cute white scoopneck top with delicate silver lace fringing the hem. The other was a light spring green long-sleeved top with sophisticated clear buttons.

I pointed at the white top. "That will go so well with your blue kitten heels."

Brit nodded and put the green top away. "I was just thinking that."

She disappeared into the bathroom to shower and I took the opportunity to finish some homework. When she came out, wrapped in a white towel, I put away my math book and hopped into the shower.

I heard the whine of a blow dryer when I climbed out. Brit sat in her desk chair applying makeup.

"Where are you going?" she asked, dusting silver shadow onto her lids.

"The Slice with Jacob," I answered, pulling out clothes.

"Ooh, that's the perfect way to celebrate Essex," she said.

"What about you?" I asked, stuffing my arms through sleeves.

"The Sweet Shoppe. I think we'll go for a walk or something after."

"That'll be cold. You should bring your coat." I suggested.

She nodded. "Good idea."

She stood up as I walked over to the mirror. "You look amazing!" she said.

"Thanks," I said. I'd chosen a dark-green scoopneck tee with silver glitter swirls. I paired it with forest-green ankle boots tugged over dark-wash skinny jeans.

My eyes slid over to Brit's reflection as she came to stand by me. "That def tops my outfit."

She blushed. "You think so?" she asked, smoothing her hands over her navy-blue skirt. She wore the white top and black leggings. Blue kitten heels adorned her feet. She had dusted minimal blush on her already-red cheeks and slivery shadow on her lids. A light coat of pink lip gloss completed the "first date" look.

"Absolutely," I said.

"Do you think Andy will think I'm trying too hard?" she asked, twisting.

"No, no," I reassured her, dabbing gloss on my lips and shrugging my coat on. She added, "I love your green eye shadow. It makes your eyes pop."

"Thanks. Accessories?" I questioned, holding up our shared box.

She nodded, grabbing her purse and coat. I chose a pair of silver chandelier earrings to go with my charm bracelet and Brit picked these adorable dangly blue rhinestone earrings.

Brit took a deep breath as I pulled open our door. It was still pretty early, and students from Orchard still streamed up and down the halls. For moment I realized that despite her calm demeanor, Brit might actually be nervous.

"It's okay," I said. "You totally hit it off at the video games and Heather's party. Besides—if you need help or he spills his entire sundae on you, BBM me and I'll call you."  
>"Thanks." A thought struck her. "Are we late?"<p>

"No, no," I said. "It's five-forty. We can make it."

She put on her coat and we strolled outside, our leisurely walk quickly breaking into an almost-run. The fierce wind blew Brit's long black hair and my earrings back. We hunched our shoulders and hurried.

I stopped at the path that split to the Slice and the Sweet Shoppe. "Andy's a great guy. You guys will be so perfect together." I gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. "Have fun!"

"Y-y-you too," she called, teeth chattering. I waved and dashed as fast as my booties would let me toward the Slice.

I reached building gratefully, enjoying the pizza-smelling air washing over me from the open door. I stopped before getting in line to rub my hands together. I scanned the tables and booths, not seeing Jacob.

The door opened behind me, a gust of cold air freezing my back. A cold hand gently patted my shoulder and I turned. Jacob.

My stomach erupted into butterflies—the good kind, the one that came from seeing the people you loved. Odd how I'd never gotten over that particular emotion.

He grinned and pulled me into a hug. I hugged back before realizing he was _cold._

"Hey!" I protested teasingly. "You're freezing."

"Exactly," he replied, green eyes twinkling. "You're warm."

Then he pulled me into a hug again. I gave it a few seconds, rubbing his hands together in mine, before pulling away.

"You know what is really warming? A nice, hot, half-pepperoni half-cheese pizza."

"Good point." He leaned down and gave me a quick kiss. "Am I late?"

"No—it's barely five fifty-three." I showed him my phone's screen, and he led me to a booth.

"So—" he began, but a waitress came up with a notepad. We ordered a pizza and two Diet Cokes, which came promptly. I sipped my drink, and he continued.

"So, Miss Shower in the Essex Fall Show, how was today?" he teased.

"Unreal. I can't believe it. I've been watching this on TV my entire life—and I'm actually showing in it. This is the highest I've ever been."

"Well, you deserve it. No one works harder or is more dedicated than you." He took one of my hands in his and squeezed. "Charm must be proud."

We talked and chatted as our pizza came. He saw that mine had only a couple pieces of pepperoni, and pulled some from his to add to mine.

I pushed back my plate and handed over some money to the waitress, who came back with a receipt. "So, what to do now?" Jacob asked me.

"There's always a video game in the media center," I suggested.

"So I can flatten you at Super Mario Bros again? Nope. I don't want to see my girlfriend subjected to that kind of humiliation."

I pretended to take offense. "I am amazing at that game. According to that last game—well, yeah, you're right."

He laughed. "What about a movie?" he suggested, naming a film we both loved and knew Canterwood had in stock.

"As long as it's with you." I said.

We left the Slice, hands twined against the cold. The night had grown colder, and my legs were freezing through my skinny jeans. Jacob put a warm arm around me.

We reached the media center just as I was going to die from hypothermia. Jacob pushed open the door, and we hurried inside, closing the door. We took a few moments to just thaw.

"That felt good," I said, walking to one of the concession cabinets. We each grabbed a Diet Coke, candy, and tubs of popcorn. We walked inside one of the private TV rooms and Jacob popped the movie in as I settled to watch it.

Two hours later, I scrubbed my buttery fingers with a napkin as the credits rolled. Jacob put away the DVDs back into their boxes, while I cleaned up the Junior Mint boxes littering the couch. I tossed them out and we both walked slowly to the door, not wanting the night to end.

Jacob gave me a good-bye kiss. "See you tomorrow." I said.

"I'll text you," he promised, and he walked out into the night.

As I went to follow, my phone vibrated into my pocket. I fished it out and opened my new text.

_To: Sasha Silver_

_ From: Brit Chan_

_ OMG! Andy...well, if ur date is done, come 2 suite NOW!_

I grinned and typed back.

_Dying 2 kno! BRT!_

I sent it, and shoved my phone in my pocket before racing toward Orchard Hall—half to fight the cold, half because I desperately wanted to know Brit's news.

More curious than ever, I had hardly reached Orchard and laid a hand on the knob of our room when the door flew open. Brit stood there, still dressed and a crazy grin on her face.

"Wow," I said, placing my hands on her shoulders and steering her toward her chair. "Spill."

"Omigod. I was so nervous when I reached the Sweet Shoppe—but Andy was so confident and calm and funny—we ordered caramel sundaes, and I thought they would be too messy for a first date but it was perfect—he gave me his last bite!" I'd never heard Brit like this.

"What happened next?" I asked.

"He walked me back to Orchard—at the door, he held my hand!" She paused to emphasize her point. "And he told me he'd never had a better time."

"Oh my god!" I squealed.

"I know. Then he promised to text me before returning to Winchester. I have his number," she gushed, scrolling through her address book and showing me the profile labeled _Andy._

"You are so perfect together!" I said.

Brit grinned and flopped onto her bed. "How was Jacob?"

We talked and chatted till Steph came up and told us off. Giggling, we pulled on pajamas and hopped into bed.

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><p><strong>Okay, here's the next chapter:<strong>

Chapter Four

I Trust My Roomie

I woke up Wednesday morning. The clock read 7: 59 am, and I froze. We were supposed to be at the stable for our lesson!

Then I remembered—we didn't have morning YENT lessons today, only afternoon. I sighed and turned over, until the silence was shattered by a loud _BEEP!_

I jumped. It was our alarm clock, which now read 8: 00 am. Brit yawned in the bed beside me and flipped on her nightstand's light.

"Morning," I said, climbing out of bed.

Brit climbed out, too, and walked to her closet. We chatted like we'd lived together since fifth grade. Everything came so easy with Brit—she didn't take my eyeliner without asking or something, or be mean when I made a mistake in choosing my outfit like the old Heather would've. I didn't have to try to keep our friendship light—it just was.


	4. I Trust My Roomie

**Okay, here's the fourth chapter! Things are starting to pick up...**

**Thanks for all your reviews! No advance sneak peek, sorry. Read and comment!**

**-MuseGoddess**

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><p>Chapter Four<p>

I Trust My Roomie

I woke up Wednesday morning. The clock read 7: 59 am, and I froze. We were supposed to be at the stable for our lesson!

Then I remembered—we didn't have morning YENT lessons today, only afternoon. I sighed and turned over, until the silence was shattered by a loud _BEEP!_

I jumped. It was our alarm clock, which now read 8: 00 am. Brit yawned in the bed beside me and flipped on her nightstand's light.

"Morning," I said, climbing out of bed.

Brit climbed out, too, and walked to her closet. We chatted like we'd lived together since fifth grade. Everything came so easy with Brit—she didn't take my eyeliner without asking or something, or be mean when I made a mistake in choosing my outfit like the old Heather would've. I didn't have to try to keep our friendship light—it just was.

I pulled a pale blue three-quarters-sleeve shirt over my head. "Danielle and Justin finally got back together—you know, the Danielle on the Trio's floor."

"Oh, I haven't heard that yet. I hope they don't break up again." Brit said.

I pulled my Manhattan boots over my black skinny jeans and fastened my charm bracelet onto my wrist. Brit pulled her hair up in a high ponytail and tugged a jacket on while I attached semi-dangly earrings to my ears. Finally, after a quick swipe of gloss, we heaved our bags onto our shoulders and left Orchard Hall.

The cool morning wind blew down the sidewalk as we joined the rush of students who were headed for the cafeteria. We waved to our friends as we walked into the caf.

As usual, at this time of day it was full of students siting at the rectangle-and-circle-shaped tables and standing in the line for—I sniffed the air as we walked in—waffles.

We got in line. I picked blueberry waffles and a glass of orange juice, while Brit chose regular ones with milk. We grabbed containers of maple syrup and looked for a place to sit.

As usual, Heather and Alison sat at the five-person table nearest the big bay window. They waved us over.

We headed over, balancing our trays, and sat. Julia's empty seat was instead full of our schoolbags. I tried not to think about it.

"Hey," I greeted them.

"Hi," Heather and Alison replied.

"You unhappy that Mr. Conner canceled our morning lesson?" Brit teased Heather.

"No, actually, that leaves more time for me and Troy to hang out before—" she stopped.

I smiled. "Before what?" Her face was red.

"History," Alison said, downing the last of her cranberry juice and standing. She caught my gaze. "Unfortunately for me, he hasn't canceled the advanced team's morning lesson."

I noticed for the first time that she was wearing riding clothes. "See you!" she called, and left.

I drizzled syrup on my waffles and took a bite. "So, how's did your last date with Troy go?"

For the rest of the morning, we chatted about the stable, our boyfriends, and classes, trying not to notice the glaring empty space where Julia should have been.

After lunch and math I walked out of the building with Brit. We had a riding lesson in a few, so we ran down to Orchard as fast as we could.

Brit fished the keys out of her pocket as her BlackBerry beeped. She handed the keys to our room to me. "Could you open that while I see this?"

"Sure," I replied, and unlocked the door. I saw Brit's face crease in confusion.

"It's Jacob," she said, showing me the screen.

Sure enough, it was. A typing signal started after his name.

_Jacob Schwartz:_

_ Can u meet me? Need 2 talk abt smthing._

"He needs to talk? Why?" Brit asked.

"Ask him," I said, throwing down my bag and starting to change. I heard Brit type something, read his reply, then type something back.

"What does he need?" I asked.

Her cheeks turned pink. "Um," she stalled, typing again.

"What?" I faced her.

She looked down at her phone. "We're in the same uh, science class. We're lab partners."

"Oh," I nodded, buttoning up my shirt and grabbing my paddock boots. "So he needs help on a lab?"

"Yeah," she said, replying to something. Then she put it facedown on her desk.

"Can you wait for me?" she asked, grabbing clothes and hurrying to the bathroom. "I won't be long—promise."

"Sure," I said, but I was focused on her phone. I had a surprising urge to read her latest BBM convo with Jacob. But that was ridiculous. I trusted her completely—but why did I feel like her "lab partner" thing wasn't completely true?

I shook my head. I had to stop being suspicious of all my roommates or I'd never be at peace. I began pulling my hair into a ponytail that would fit under my helmet.

_But, _a small voice in my mind said, _what about Paige?_

_ What about Paige? _I argued back.

_You were right about Paige, even if you didn't have any proof._

_ So? _I asked.

_At least check. Her phone's right there!_

_ No. She's my friend. She wouldn't lie to me._

_ Like you didn't lie to your friends? Maybe she's trying to protect you like you were trying to protect your friends._

I hesitated, then turned back and looped a hair tie around my ponytail. I would never stoop that low.

Brit stepped out, clad in dark gray breeches and a light purple shirt. Her hair was up too. "Ready?" she asked.

"Yeah," I forced myself to smile, and we headed to the stable.


	5. A Study Date

**Okay, sorry it took me a long time to update! Thanks for all your comments, they really helped! **

**Enjoy chapter 5, and READ AND COMMENT!**

**-MuseGoddess**

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><p>Chapter Five<p>

A Study Date

The next day after our afternoon riding lesson, we headed for our dorm. I pulled open the door and stepped inside, shedding my backpack and grabbing a pair of sweats. "So much homework!" I moaned. "I'm just going to have to glue myself to my desk."

Brit grinned tightly. "Yeah. I'd love to do homework with you, but . . ."

I looked over and saw that she had a long-sleeve blue shirt and jeans in her hands. "What? Where are you going?"

"The . . . library. With Jacob. To . . . uh, go over our science lab notes." She peered over at me cautiously.

"Oh. Sure. That's nice. I mean, that's great. What are you working on? Is it forces and motion? Because I really, really hate that. Even chemical interactions would be easier . . ." I trailed off, suddenly aware that I was babbling.

We stood there awkwardly, and then snapped into motion. Brit headed to the bathroom and I changed. As the drum of the shower began, I mechanically unpacked, setting out my books with surgical precision. But my mind was spinning. Why did I feel so untrusting? It was so juvenile. It wasn't like . . . no. Brit couldn't secretly have a crush on Jacob. That was just my tired brain spotting lies where they didn't exist.

I managed to get through half my history homework before my phone beeped.

_To: Sasha Silver_

_ From: Paige Parker_

Paige? My eyes widened. Why was she…then I remembered we were finally on our way to repairing our friendship. I opened the text.

_Just txting 2 c if u wanted to come over to my suite. 2, u kno, do hw 2gether. If u don't want 2 that's okay. Geena's w/her friend the media cntr now, so I thought I'd ask._

I hurriedly texted back.

_Of course I want 2! Be rite over._

I started packing up my stuff, shoving the books haphazardly into my bag. Brit came out and started to flatiron her hair while I was packing.

"Where are you going?" she asked, clipping her hair into sections.

"Paige's. She invited me to her suite to study."

"Oh, that's awesome! You guys can finally get back to your usual BFFness." Brit smiled.

I quickly changed into a soft cotton lavender tee and jeggings, perfect for a casual study date. I slipped the last of my notebooks into my bag and took a deep breath.

Brit noticed this. "It'll be okay. It's only Paige."

"Right. Only Paige. But what if she brings up the—"

"She won't. Paige isn't that stubborn or insensitive. She knows you told her the truth, and that has to be enough."

"But it's our first time actually being…sort-of friends again. What if I mess up—make some sort of rude comment or snarky comeback accidentally—and rip it up again?"

"You won't. I know you, Sasha," Brit said firmly. "You were friends before."

"But how do you—" I hitched my bag higher on my shoulder "—how do you know?"

"You didn't do anything bad last time, Sasha. She…" Brit hesitated, and I knew she didn't want to diss Paige. "I would've done the same if I were you. Including keeping it from your BFF. You weren't ready to share, and she had to accept that."

"Okay." I gave her a hug. "That made me feel better."

Brit tucked her BlackBerry into her pocket. "Anytime. And if…you need to…BBM me and I'll come back early."

"Thanks." We walked out into the cold November gale, and I hugged my coat tighter around me. Brit rubbed her gloved hands together.

With Brit giving me pep talks like this, it was pretty hard to see her going behind my back like I'd thought—fleetingly—she'd had. It was stupid.

"I remember the first time I talked to Karlie after we weren't BFFs anymore." Brit said.

"Really?" I asked. "When?" Brit didn't really talk about her former BFF a lot. I knew it was a touchy subject for her, like Callie was—is—for me. I totally understood that.

"I was shopping with one of my other friends at Forever 21. I saw Karlie with Justine there too."

"What happened?"

"They came over to a rack close to ours. Neither of them took notice of me, which hurt…a bit." Brit shifted her bag to her other shoulder. "I finally got up the courage to say hi, but Justine just made a face and said to Karlie, 'Don't talk to that loser.' Then they left." She kicked a crumbling leaf away harder than necessary. "But that's okay. I mean, Canterwood is really nice. And I have you, Heather and Alison, Andy"—her face turned a little red at the mention of him—"and I love it here. I'm not really missing anything, except for my family."

I gave her a hug. Brit smiled, but all I could think about was Heather's former BFFs Blake and Emma. I'd met them over fall break when I'd stayed at Heather's Park Avenue penthouse. We'd been practicing at Chesterfield, and Blake had torn up Heather's ride. Heather, of course, had defended herself. A wry smile touched my lips. Blake was pretty much the _only _girl I'd ever seen who could insult Heather like that and get away unscathed.

I looked up and saw Winchester Hall approaching. I waved goodbye to Brit and climbed the stone steps.

When I stepped into the eighth-grade dorm, everything hit me with a familiar, aching rush—the eggshell-white walls, the blond hardwood floors, the cozy wooden doors. I saw a wreath of red-gold leaves decorating the wall space above the wooden tables, where small golden cornucopias sat surrounded with plastic fruit.

I passed the common room and saw some of my friends—Vanessa Ortiz, Nicole Allen—talking. They waved to me in surprise. I grinned back, then kept walking till I reached Livvie's office. I tapped my nail on the glass.

My former dorm monitor opened the door. "Hey!" she said warmly. Livvie looked the same as ever. "Long time no see!"

"Yeah," I said, smiling awkwardly. Seeing her reminded me of how I'd left Winchester for Orchard—and Paige for Brit.

"What brings you here?" Livvie asked.

"Paige. I'm seeing her to…do homework together." I pretended not to notice how her eyes widened in surprise.

"Well. Don't want to keep her waiting." Livvie smiled, then leaned closer and whispered, "I'm glad you're making up. I miss seeing you around."

I wasn't surprised. Livvie was very perceptive, and knew half the school gossip before it even hit some people's ears.

"See you around!" I called, then left her office and walked down to my—Paige's—room. I could still remember the way, and probably could still walk to it with my eyes closed. It hadn't been long since I'd left.

I decided not to test my theory, however, and knocked on my former dorm's door with my eyes wide open. I bit my lip. I had never had to knock on this particular door before—I had always had a key.

Paige opened the door instantly. She looked half-surprised to see me here. "Sasha! Hey!"

She looked fashionable yet comfortable in a cozy blue cardigan and tight, flared sweatpants. Her red hair was pulled up loosely in a low, messy bun.

"Hi." She ushered me inside, and it felt weird to be shown around my old room.

Not much had changed. Paige's bed hadn't, but mine—Geena's; I had to stop thinking of things here as mine—had a starry purple comforter on it instead of my thick pink one and had numerous pictures of people—probably Geena's friends and family back home—decorating the headboard. On the wall was a poster of a cute, blond guy who looked a little like Liam Hemsworth. He was holding a frying pan and wearing a chef's apron. The Food Network for Kids logo was in the corner, so I assumed he was one of Paige's co-workers.

"That's Chad MacMillan. He's on the Food Network for Kids with me, and I introduced Geena to him over break. She can't get over him, obviously." Paige explained.

I grinned, and surveyed the rest of the room. There were numerous stacks of cookbooks scattered around on desks and the corners of the room. On the tiny kitchenette's counters were trays of delicious-looking brownie bites drenched in chocolate sauce.

"Whoa," I breathed. "Did you make those?"

"No—Geena did. She's practicing for a competition." Paige told me, then grinned. "Want to try one? She's always on the lookout for new tasters."

I pretended to think about it. "Yes!"

We walked over and grabbed a few. I stuck one in my mouth. "Oh, that's amazing."

"Yeah. She's definitely going to win." Paige said. "Do you want to get something before we start?" She gestured to our full schoolbags.

"Yes, or I'll never begin. I could eat these all day!" I said. They were amazing; rich and deep and chocolatey.

As we started out the door, Paige turned, looking intently at me. "I really appreciate you coming, Sasha," she said, pushing open the door.

"I wouldn't have missed it. I want to fix our friendship as much as you do—maybe more. I'm really sorry I didn't tell you about Jacob."

Paige hesitated, looking as if she wanted to tell me something, then thought better of it. She linked her arm through mine. "I really need Sierra Mist—now."

It was a little awkward as we made our way to the common room, because I knew the past between us wasn't going to magically go away. But I wanted it to, so I eased myself in the conversation. I could almost pretend we were still super-close. But there were those little things that glaringly pointed out that we were not BFFs.

"How are things with Ryan?" I asked, selecting a bag of barbeque Pop Chips. I glanced sideways at her. I would already know this if we'd still been living together.

"They're good." Paige replied, grabbing a pack of low-fat pretzels and leading me over to the fridge. "I'm seeing his basketball game tomorrow against Pershing Prep."

She pulled open the door and paused, cold air flowing out. "How about you and Jacob?"

I started, my can of raspberry can soda almost slipping from my finger. I was surprised she'd bring up Jacob, since that's what we'd fought about—me not telling her about my meeting with Jacob at the fountain.

"It's amazing." I smiled, as I usually did when I thought about my boyfriend—the way his emerald eyes sparkled in the sun, when his brown hair flopped into his eyes and turned lighter in the sun, how his arm felt, warm and protective, around my shoulders.

"Earth to Sasha." Paige nudged me. "I love daydreaming about Ryan too." She grinned.

"I already told you about how Heather pushed us together…"

Over spring break at Heather's Park Avenue penthouse, she'd seen how much I wanted to be with Jacob and hacked my email, arranging for us to meet at th fountain. I'd been supermad at her, but realized that that was actually what I'd needed all that time.

I told Paige all about our dates, and she filled me in about her recent ones with Ryan.

Paige dug her key into my former dorm's lock, shoved the door with her hip, and walked in, setting her soda and pretzels down on her desk.

"I'm happy for you. You deserved a guy like Jacob in your life."

She sat and started pulling out her books, laying them out and flipping open a blue notebook labeled HISTORY. I plopped into Geena's purple desk chair and got to work. We worked on our homework in dutiful silence, only broken by a crunch of chips or sip of soda. I peeked over at Paige as I finished a language essay, and we grinned at each other. Just like that, I knew. We'd get our full friendship status back. I was sure of it.

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><p><strong>Yay and all for Paige, but Brit is a really, really terrible liar. Could she and Jacob...<strong>

**I'm being really cruel here, laying on the suspense. But I can't tell you! Not yet.**


	6. Totally Ridiculous

**So I finished this chapter...pretty soon actually. Please READ AND COMMENT...I NEED COMMENTS! **

**Questions...**

**Anything would be welcome.**

**Just noticed that I haven't done a riding lesson in a while...count on that in chapter seven!**

**-MuseGoddess**

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><p>Chapter Six<p>

Totally Ridiculous

Three hours later, I highlighted one last sentence and snapped my copy of _Alice in Wonderland _shut.

"Done," I said, tossing my pink highlighter away.

Paige glanced up from her copy. "Really?"

"Really." I took a pen and drew a line through the words _Annotate chapters 5-7 AIW _in my assignment notebook.

"Lucky." She closed her book and examined her math worksheet. "What did you get as the pizazz answer?"

"Uh, hold on a sec." I dug through and flipped my completed sheet at her. She suppressed a smile at the lame joke.

"Seriously, they get cheesier every day. _'Why did Karjam get a flat tire? There was a fork in the road!_'" she quipped, comparing her answer with mine. "Okay, I got it right."

"You sure?"

"Sure."

I slowly slipped it back into my folder. "Thanks for letting me come over," I said, staring sideways at her.

"It's totally okay. I would've let you come over anytime," Paige replied, waving it away.

I glanced at the clock, not wanting to miss curfew but also not wanting my time with Paige to end. I'd almost doubted that we'd ever talk to each other again. But now…it just proved that friends could make up. And—my mind spun—could Callie and I ever become real friends ever again, not just this uneasy acceptance of each other to keep the YENT team together?

"You should get back to Orchard now," Paige said, fixing her eyes on the hour hand that slowly crept to eight o'clock.

"Do you want to eat with me during breakfast tomorrow?" I asked. I usually ate with what was left of the Trio and Brit now but…

"Sure. I'd love to." If she was puzzled by my request she didn't show it.

I got up, slinging my bag on my shoulder. Paige walked with me to the door. There was one last thing to clear up.

"Paige, I just wanted to let you know that I'm really sorry that I blew up about the Homecoming thing. I know you had to be there for Callie when I wasn't. I realize that you just wanted to be a good friend to her and didn't mean to hurt me." I shifted my grip on the doorknob. "I understand why you told her. It's what I would've done. I mean, you couldn't really keep the truth from her anymore when she heard the whole thing. And I shouldn't have kept my meeting with Jacob from you."

"No, that was my fault." Paige looked at the floor. "I should've accepted that you weren't ready to share. I was just hurt that you told Heather about your meeting with Jacob and you didn't tell me. It sounds really stupid to be jealous of her, but I was. And that cost me my friendship."

I absorbed this. "You never have to be jealous of her, Paige. I managed to be BFFs with you _and _Callie, remember?"

"I know." She smiled. "And about Homecoming…that wasn't my secret to share, even though she did hear everything already. I should've asked you."

"How about we tell each other everything, and ask before we spill secrets?" I suggested. "And stop apologizing to each other!" I said in mock irritation. "We both messed up."

Paige laughed. "Deal. So…see you tomorrow?" she asked, pulling open the door.

"Definitely."

I slung my bag over my shoulder and walked out, happy. I'd cleared the air with Paige, and a small hope fluttered in my chest that I could befriend Callie again.

As I stepped out into the cold November air, I decided to swing by the library and walk back to Orchard with Brit. It was along the way, after all.

I treaded the familiar path to the red-brick, three-story library, complete with a whole floor full of Apple desktops and color-jet printers.

I sent a quick text to Brit—_U done yet? Outside lib—finished hmwrk w/Paige. _

She didn't respond. I walked inside and found Alison poring over a thick book. Colorful illustrations of medieval knights filled the pages.

"Oh hey Sasha," she said, pushing aside the book, which I recognized as an advanced history textbook.

"Hey. Um, have you seen Brit and Jacob?"

"Yes. They left a while ago, though."

"Thanks." I left, reasoning that she'd already be at Orchard.

I took a left and kept walking, past the media center and toward Orchard. As I passed the Sweet Shoppe, I saw something that made me stop completely.

Brit and Jacob. Sitting together in the small corner booth, where I usually sat with Jacob. They laughed. Brit threw back her hair and smiled, and Jacob, his face split into an adorable grin, tapped whipped cream onto her nose.

My stomach clenched. Could he be flirting with her?

I slipped into the dark shadow of an umbrella outside the Shoppe. Brit, giggling, wiped the cream off. She took a deep breath and said something else, something that made Jacob double up with laughter and—even from here—I could see him smile at her.

I whipped around and ran as fast as I could toward my dorm, trying to block out the images of what I'd just seen and the accusatory things that poured into my head, all of them directed at Brit. _Traitor! Boyfriend-stealer! _I tried to look at it in a different light. _Jacob betrayed me! _Nope, wrong light.

I could feel tears coming on, and I shoved the glass door hard. It swung open, almost hitting someone. He looked me, annoyed, but I couldn't care less.

Finally, I reached my room. It took me five tries to get the key in the lock. I wrenched the door open, locked it, and put the chain on—something I'd agreed with Brit never to do. Then I threw down my messenger bag, collapsed on my bed and let the tears stream out. How could she?

"Maybe I'm wrong," I said aloud. I hoped that I was, with all my heart. I replayed the scene. Andy and I teased each other sometimes. I remembered the way Troy, Ben and Andy, the "stable boys" had surprised me with a "Boo!" last month and how I'd laughed. That didn't mean I was trying to steal Troy from Heather or Ben from Julia, right? So maybe I was overthinking this. I tried to see it rationally.

What I knew: Brit had lied to me about her science partner being Jacob. Did that mean she was secretly dating him? No. Maybe they switched or something, although the last time I checked Mr. Manson didn't allow that.

Andy made me laugh. I remembered all the funny jokes he'd ever told me. Did that mean I suddenly had a crush on him? Nope.

I reasoned with myself all throughout changing and slipping into bed. _Don't be totally ridiculous, _I told myself.

I'd almost convinced myself that I was wrong and she didn't like him when there was a click in the lock. The door opened somewhat, then jammed. Someone started shaking the door softly.

"Sash! Hey, Sasha!"

I bolted up. "Huh?"

"Did you put on the chain?" Brit.

"Oh...yeah. Sorry." I unlocked it and stepped aside. Brit walked in.

"So, how was Paige?" she asked brightly.

"It was good." I fake-yawned. I didn't really feel like talking to her right then. "I'll fill you in tomorrow—I'm really tired. But…" I tried not to sound too accusatory "…how was your study date?" I almost choked on the word "date".

"Fun." She opened a drawer, pulled out some clothes, and disappeared into the bathroom. "Good to know you made up with Paige," she added, her voice a bit muffled by the door.

"Yeah," I whispered.

"And don't forget—we…" Brit began, but I didn't catch the last part—probably because I'd drifted off.


	7. It's Too Late, To Apologize

**Here's chapter seven! It's extra-long to make up for the long period I didn't update...writers block is my new least-favorite sickness. It took me a long time to decide on my chapter title.**

**The riding lesson I promised is also included...but that's not all! Read to find out! (Wow, I sound like an overenthusiastic salesperson.) By the way-do any of you guys actually read the bolded parts? Or does it actually kind of distract from the reading a little?**

**Thank you for all your reviews, you all rule! Anyway, READ AND COMMENT! **

**-MuseGoddess**

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><p>Chapter Seven<p>

"It's Too Late, To Apologize"

I turned over and blinked myself awake. Something was ringing, the sound punching through the walls of drowsiness. It took a few seconds to recognize it as my ringtone.

"Uhhh…" Brit yawned. "Turn it off…"

I made a swipe for my bedstand and felt for the green answer button.

"Hello?" I asked groggily.

"SILVER!" At the sound of Heather's furious voice, I woke up completely.

"What is it?" I said, annoyed.

"Our morning lesson is right now! Where are you?"

"Huh?" I replied. "It's not until seven-thirty."

"Exactly."

"You don't mean…" I chanced a quick glance at the pool-blue wall clock. "_Seven-fifteen?_ Oh my god."

"Yeah. I'm already at the stable, so why don't you and Brit HURRY UP? I have…something to tell you."

"Okay, okay. We'll be there. Thanks," I told her, throwing off my blankets and shooting to my feet.

"You owe me. Big-time." And on that happy note, Heather hung up.

"Brit!" I hurried over to my dresser and yanked a pair of breeches on, not even caring what color they were. "Brit! We need to get up. It's seven-fifteen, and we'll be late for our lesson!"

Brit stretched and sat up. "What happened to the alarm?" she asked, pressing a few buttons on the white alarm where my pink iPod was docked. She peered closely at the screen and showed it to me. The bell icon wasn't there.

I winced. "I didn't set it yesterday on accident."  
>"I told you to last night!"<p>

"Oh, sorry. Must've forgot."

"We can't be late, not this close to Essex!"

_Essex. _I'd completely forgotten about that. It made me change faster. "I know!" I said, yanking a shirt on my head. I didn't register anything about it except the fact that it was yellow. "Come on!" I told her.

I brushed my teeth as fast as I could while Brit hastily did my hair. Then I did the same for her. We pulled on our boots in record time, and then raced each other to the stables. We burst inside just as Heather was unclipping Aristocrat's crossties.

"Indoor arena. Jumping," she told us. "And Sasha, you look like a traffic sign."

I spared a quick glance at my yellow shirt, red breeches, and dark-green paddock boots. _Ugh._

_ "_Whatever. I'll fix it later. But I need you to distract Mr. Conner."

"What?"

"Just do it! Please!"

She rolled her eyes and muttered something under her breath. I pushed past her horse and sprinted to Charm's stall.

"Charm! I woke up late and we're late for our lesson and you need to get up so I can tack and groom you!"

At the word "tack," he opened one eye and got to his feet.

"Good boy." I raced out of the stall, grabbed his tack, and hurried back, setting it down on his trunk.

Charm understood that I needed to move fast, because he stood perfectly still as I tied him to the bars of his stall door. I skipped over brushing him with the currycomb since I was in a hurry, and used a dandy brush to sweep bits of hay and dust from his coat. I whisked the fuchsia body brush over him in one quick stroke. So his coat didn't sparkle like a fresh-minted penny. I'd make it up to him later.

I picked his hooves so fast my hands shook, thanking the fact that he hadn't been let out yet. Charm grunted as I pressed down on a tender spot, and he winced. "Sorry, boy!"

Dropping the tools back into his box, I smoothed his saddle pad on his back and heaved the white saddle on top. Tightening the girth took seconds. I untied him, slipped the reins around his neck, and held the bit in my palm. He took it quickly. I pulled the crown piece over his ears, grabbed my helmet, and led him quickly down the aisle, weaving him around students and horses in crossties. Apparently, not so much weaving as plowing. Charm kept stepping on other riders' feet and shafting horses to the sides. They glared at me and hissed, "Watch it!" or squealed, "Ow!"

I entered the indoor arena at a canter. I quickly scanned the arena, waving hello to Heather and half-smiling at Callie. No Mr. Conner. But where was Brit?

As I started a working trot around the arena, hoofbeats signaled Brit's arrival. She petted Apollo's mane, and rode him over to me. Heather moved Aristocrat closer to join us.

"Wow, that was close," Brit said, pretending to wipe sweat from her forehead. "I'll have to extra-groom Apollo after our lesson."

"Given," I smiled.

"So what was it this time?" Heather asked, executing a complicated twist in the saddle that loosened out her back.

"I…forgot to turn on the alarm yesterday," I told her. Saying it made a blush spread, hot and shameful, over my cheeks.

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, Silver" was all she said before turning Aristocrat away and squeezing him into a collected trot. Charm, shaking back his mane, cantered after him. I grabbed his reins and steadied myself.

"No. Trot." I pushed my weight down, into my heels, and he slowed. I made him stop and wait. Apollo cantered past us, and I let him into a trot.

Charm bounced forward at what was most _definitely _not a trot, nearly tossing me. I pulled on the reins. He shook his head and snorted, but listened to me and moved toward the wall at a fast walk. I pushed him faster, and we made a neat circuit at a trot. I let him into a veerry slow canter, trying not to excite him, and we completed another circle around the arena.

We made two more circles, one at a near-gallop and one at a fast trot, before stopping. Mr. Conner had come in halfway through our warm-up, and studied us with a critical eye. He'd graduated to one crutch now, and he had his clipboard in his hand.

"Okay, girls," he said, and we all halted and looked up. "If you will, please move your horses to the side and let Mike and Doug set up…"

I heeled Charm, and he trotted briskly toward the wall, joining Heather. Brit pulled Apollo up on my other side as Mike walked in, making for the pile of jumps. He was closely followed by Doug.

Heather inched Aristocrat closer to Brit and I. I looked over at her and Brit peered over Charm to see what was going on.

Heather pulled out her glittery-gold-encased Blackberry.

"What are you doing?" I hissed, eyes on Mr. Conner. His most adamant rule, besides no abusing the horses, was phones in the arena. Heather faced being kicked out of the lesson if she was caught. He was currently advising Doug on where to place a striped vertical.

"It's important," she whispered back. "Julia texted me this morning."

_"What?"_

"She did? What did she say?" Brit asked.

Heather pressed a few buttons on her phone, and discreetly handed it to me. I half-buried it in Charm's mane to hide it and scanned the text.

_To: Heather Fox_

_ From: Julia Myer_

_ Heather, I really am sorry 4 what I blogged abt u and evry1 else. I miss u guys, even Sasha and Brit, can u believe it?_—I rolled my eyes.—_Pls just txt me or something. Even just to say ur not ready 2 discuss. Jas is the only 1 here who pays any attention 2 me. Evry1 else treats me like an outcast. I wish I was back there w/u guys. ~J_

I passed the phone to Brit, who read it quickly and handed it back to Heather.

"She really wrote all that?" I mouthed.

"Yeah," Heather replied, stowing the phone back in her royal purple jacket.

"Have you replied?" Brit asked.

"No, because I don't know what to tell her!"

_Well, that would be a first, _I wanted to say, but I kept my pina-colada-flavored-lip-glossed mouth shut.

"Well, you could say that—" Brit paused when Mr. Conner glanced at us "—you aren't ready to discuss it, like she said."

"I am ready to discuss it, there's just nothing to say! I just can't forgive her for what she did. Maybe later, but not now."

I thought for a minute. "But I could. I'll text her."

Brit nodded. "Good idea. I will too." Seeing the guilty, torn look on Heather's face, she added, "It's not your fault that you can't forgive. It doesn't make you a bad person. You were closer to her, so the scars are deeper."

"Yeah," I agreed. "She just has to wait. She can't demand that you forgive her right away. Scars—" I looked at Brit "—need their own time to heal."

Heather smiled. "Thanks, guys," she told us. For those three minutes, I saw the vulnerable Heather, the one that mourned over best friends and cowered before her dad.

Brit opened her mouth to reply, but Mr. Conner cut her off. "So, girls, what do you think of the course?"

I studied the jumps. It looked complicated.

The first part started out easy. Three verticals, with plenty of space between them. Then two oxers, fairly close together, painted sparkling gold and blue.

The sixth jump was a hogs back jump—one that I'd practiced a little bit, but never done in a show. It was one of the hardest jumps _ever. _Hogs backs consisted of three verticals of varying height clumped close together, making a fairly wide space for a horse to jump.

**(A.N.-Okay, I know that in the first book Sasha and Heather face off when jumping a hogs back jump-remember, they try to both jump it but Sasha is the better person and pulls up, and Mr. C punishes them anyway. (Something like that.) Anyway, I needed something challenging so I used it. I hope you don't hate me.)**

After that was a double combination, an oxer decorated with bright plastic flowers, and finally a high yellow-and-black vertical.

Brit whistled through her teeth. "Wow."

Even Heather was silent for a moment, but she regained her composure and tossed her hair back. "We can take it. We're the YENT team." Vulnerable Heather was gone, and Regular Heather was back again. She pushed back her shoulders and raised her chin.

Blackjack, Callie's Morab gelding, snorted.

"I know it look a little complicated girls, but I have complete confidence in you." Mr. Conner settled himself into his director's hair. "Heather, you're up first."

Heather steadied Aristocrat, and moved toward the first jump. She took the first three easily. Then, increasing Aristocrat's speed to a working canter, they leaped both oxers.

But before the hogs back, Aristocrat hesitated and slowed, his eyes wide and nostrils flaring. Heather tried to push him faster but it was too late. A second too late, they leaped and the last rail knocked to the ground.

I could read the disappointment on Heather's face but she hid it quickly. She moved toward the double combination, jumping it easily. Then they rode over to the flowerboxes. Aristocrat slowed again, already spooked from the hogs back. He took off and rushed the jump. It thudded hard to the ground, and ten seconds later he leapt cleanly over the last vertical.

Heather heeled Aristocrat over to Mr. Conner, waiting for judgment.

"What do you think of your ride?" he asked her.

She patted Aristocrat. "I think I did okay until the hogs back. Aristocrat wasn't used to the jump and slowed."

Mr. Conner thought this over, and said, "How would you think to fix it?"

"I could practice him over the jump more. This was only his second to third time on it." Heather worked to keep the defensiveness from her tone.

"I would agree with that. Overall, it was a good ride. Your form was near perfect, but on the jump you rushed you could've seen it and slowed him."

Heather took the compliments and errors with a nod and rode Aristocrat over to me.

"Sasha, you're up next." He settled back into his director's chair.

I took a deep yoga breath. "C'mon, Charm," I whispered to him. I'd think about what I would text Julia and say to Heather later. First, I needed to clear this course.

I circled him twice around instead of once because I needed to collect my thoughts, shoving them into the TOL (to open later) part of my brain. Then I pointed him at the first vertical.

He broke into a fast canter and leaped the jump. Two strides later he was back in the air. I tightened my legs and he leaped up, clearing the last vertical easily.

We cantered half a circle before reaching the oxers. The sunlight streaming in blinded me for a second, reflecting off the stripes and bouncing gold into my eyes, but I shook it away. I let him increase a notch to get over the oxer, blinking away the afterimage.

A stride later I moved my hands up his neck and he leaped the second oxer cleanly.

We headed for the hogs back. I took him in a wide circle around the arena to prepare, before pointing him at the hogs back.

"S'okay," I muttered. Not wanting to make the same mistake Heather had, I kept my legs tight and urged him faster. Charm's ears flicked back toward me, and he transitioned into a slow gallop.

_Almost there._ Now if we could just keep up this speed…

Six strides away, I felt him slow.

"No!" I murmured, but there was no time. _Three, two, one! _He leaped up, and I glanced down. His hoof brushed the third rail, but when we landed it didn't fall. We had been going fast enough that when he'd slowed it hadn't made so much of a difference.

I cheered silently, but then snapped back to focus. We still had half the course left.

I slowed Charm to a collected canter and we leaped the double combination easily. Charm's ears flicked toward the bright flowers on the next oxer, but I pulled on the reins and we managed to jump it cleanly.

Last jump. It was pretty high, designed to challenge the horse when they were most tired. Charm was already panting.

"One more, boy," I whispered, holding back his speed. He tossed his head, asking for more rein, but I didn't give. I counted down the strides. _Six, five, four, three, two, one!_

He pushed off from the ground and I panicked. Should I have given him more rein? With a jump of this height, we needed the extra speed. But Charm had a history of rushing last jumps.

We hung suspended in the air for a split second. A shudder ran through Charm's body as he brushed the rail. Then Charm landed firmly, though I felt the soft arena dirt beneath his hooves give a little. He cantered for a few strides, expending the momentum, while I listened for the inevitable _thunk _of the rail smashing onto the dirt.

I didn't hear it. Slowing Charm to a walk, I swung him around to face the last rail. Miraculously, it wobbled slightly but stayed in place.

We hadn't knocked the rail! This was one of our best rides yet!

I slowed Charm before Mr. Conner and rubbed his neck. "You did amazing!" I cheered. For the first time, I really felt like a YENT rider.

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><p><strong>Read and comment!<strong>

**A question: Does anybody know how to upload a cover picture to an already made story? It's been bugging me-I have this awesome Sasha pic but I can't upload it! : ( **


	8. Real Smooth, Silver

**Okay, here's chapter eight! It's going kind of slow, I know, and you're probably losing interes right now. But Ch. 9 is going to be better I promise!**

**Read and Comment!**

**-MuseGoddess**

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><p>Chapter Eight<p>

Real Smooth, Silver

"That was in-_tense_," Brit whispered to me as we led Apollo and Charm around the arena to cool them.

"No kidding," I said, tugging on Charm's brown suede lead line gently as he nearly sidestepped into Apollo. "Charm looks ready for a nap."

Brit tilted her head at me. "_No_, I meant the Julia thing."

"Oh." I picked at my OPI Pompeii Purple nail polish.

"So…" Brit started.

"So, what?"

"So what are you going to text Julia?"

I stroked Charm's neck. "I don't know. What she did was really, really wrong but I can't imagine anything worse than having to go to the same school as the Princess of Darkness."

Brit grinned. "I don't know. You survived Jasmine in Canterwood."

"Barely," I said, shuddering.

"No, but seriously. What are you going to text her?"

"I'm sure I'll come up with something. I mean, Mrs. Utz's math classes are _really_ stimulating for the mind." I grinned.

Brit laughed. "Totally. Yesterday I discovered the meaning of life there."

I put a hand to my melon-glossed mouth in mock surprise. "Really? What is it?"

"Horses!" We both blurted, and dissolved into giggles. Heather, across the arena, shot us a you-guys-are-weird look.

"I think Apollo's cool. Want to hand them off to Mike and Doug now? I'll wait for you." Brit smoothed her gold cashmere sweater.

"No, Charm's cool. We can head back to Orchard."

We handed Apollo and Charm's lead lines to Mike, who dipped his head. "Thanks," I told him.

"We really appreciate it," Brit said.

"My pleasure, girls. Have a nice day!"

"See you this afternoon, Charm," I told him, rubbing his blaze.

We walked back to Orchard Hall in a chilly silence, all our energy being sapped to keep us warm. I flicked a piece of chestnut horsehair from my ash gray peacoat and breathed into my palms to warm them. They smelled like the aloe vera stable soap and Charm's unique scent of sweet hay, grain, and a hint of his fave green apple shampoo.

We raced each other to the glass door. The campus was slowly beginning to come alive. I could hear the shouts of the soccer team across the courtyard. The streetlights were flickering off and the sun sent a slow flood of gold light over the buildings and greenery.

As I stopped to let Brit go first, my mind raced. What _was_ I going to tell Julia?

The question stayed with me as I solved math problems, conjugated Spanish verbs, and studied compound adjectives. At lunchtime, I met up with Brit and we fell in line in the cafeteria. I accepted a scoop of rice and lemon chicken, grabbing a Diet Coke and a bowl of vanilla pudding. We made our way to the round five-person table that belonged exclusively to the Trio.

Alison and Heather looked up from their food when we approached and dumped our stuff. They were stifling giggles, their loud laughs attracting stares around the cafeteria.

"What's so funny?" Brit asked, setting down her tray and sliding into her seat in one fluid motion. A perfectly conditioned sheet of black silky hair swung around and settled gently onto the shoulders of her navy satin blazer.

Over my shoulder I saw Jacob entering the cafeteria and decided to copy Brit. When I tried to replicate the move, the edge of my tray slipped and crashed into Alison's Diet Pepsi. She caught it just in time. My golden-brown hair whipped into my face and stuck to my green-apple-Lip Smackers-covered lips.

Heather just stared at my burning red face. "Real smooth, Silver," she said, only half-joking. I ducked my head and pulled strands of hair out of my lip gloss.

Brit _one_, Sasha _zero_. Definitely needed to practice that.

"Nothing," Alison said.

Brit didn't press her. Taking a sip of soda, she asked Heather, "How are things with Troy?"

I leaned forward, food forgotten, as Heather smiled at the mention of her boyfriend. They'd been dating for less than a month, but it was hard to imagine two people more right for each other.

"They're great." Heather clacked her chopsticks together. "I'm meeting his parents when they pick him up for Thanksgiving."

"Nervous?" I asked, seeing the panicked look that flitted across her face.

"No…well, a little bit." She fiddled with the hem of her candy pink shirtdress uncomfortably.

"Why?" Alison asked.

"Other than the fact that I'm afraid Mr. and Mrs. Caldwell won't like me…" Heather swirled her chow mein around. "It's just…after I meet Troy's parents, he'll want to meet mine too. Only that can't happen, obviously."

"They don't know Troy exists, do they?" Brit asked gently.

Heather numbly shook her head.

I felt a surge of sympathy for her. Her dad had to be one of the worst dads in existence. I'd listened to Heather plead with Mr. Fox and occasionally get her way (though I had _no_ idea how she did it). But if she told her parents she was dating a boy, there was no way she would win. Her dad would force her to break up with Troy on the grounds that it was interfering with her riding—which it _so_ wasn't. Heather could juggle it all.

"Has he asked to meet them?" Alison asked.

"No. Troy knows my family's a touchy subject," Heather explained. "We don't talk about it."

Awkward silence. Then—

"What about you and Andy?" Heather asked Brit, steering the conversation away from herself.

"We just became official boyfriend and girlfriend," Brit informed us, grinning.

This was rewarded with loud squeals from Heather and Alison. I already knew.

"Omigosh when? And how? Give a girl _dee-tails_!" Alison squealed.

"Well, I

We spent the rest of lunch discussing the exact moment Brit and Andy became BF-GF.

After our afternoon riding lesson, I stopped by Stephanie's office to pick up a box from .

"Hey," Brit said. She looked up from her phone. "Your box came!"

"Yeah," I said, plopping down at our makeup counter (Brit's desk with a mirror propped on it) and tearing it open.

"So I texted Julia," Brit said. I held up a soft gray eyeliner pencil and tested it.

"You did?" I asked, digging through and grabbing the Dior Addict Lip Polish in Pale Red.

Brit nodded. "She hasn't texted back yet. You?"

"I need to do that. Hey, do you want to try this?" I waved a Juicy Apple Clinique lip gloss tube at her.

"Hmm…" she pretended to think, "Yeah!"

She took the tube from me and applied a thin coat. I pulled out my candy-pink BlackBerry and hit COMPOSE.

_Thx 4 apologizing. Most ppl wouldn't do tht much. It's a little hard 4 me 2 4get wat u did but I 4give u. Heather isn't ready 2 talk yet but I kno she'll come around soon._

I paused, and then added the last line slowly.

_We miss u 2._

I read out my completed text to Brit, and then hit send.

"I hope she's okay at Wellington." Brit said, handing the Juicy Apple tube back to me.

"Jasmine's not framing her anymore, I hope." I replied, shuddering.

Brit thought it over. "But sounds like they're friends now. In Heather's text it said that Jas was the only person who paid any attention to her."

"You think they'll form their own evil Duo? Julia wouldn't."

But I wasn't sure. I'd seen what Jasmine could do.

Brit's phone _dinged. _Seconds later, my BlackBerry vibrated.

I opened the text. It was from Heather.

_I got the new Bryce Oliver movie! Do u guys want to c it? We can hv a sleepover._

"Hey Brit," I said. "Heather's inviting us over for a sleepover."

"I'd love to go, but…" she paused and played with the ends of her hair.

"What?"

"I'm meeting up with Jacob for…science class."

"Oh. Well, I guess it'll be just me and the Trio, then." I fought to keep my voce neutral.

"Yeah. I'm sorry I can't go."

"That's okay." I bit my lip as I texted back, _That would b gr8. When do I come over? Brit is meeting her lab partner and can't come._

Brit had been hanging out with Jacob a lot lately. And didn't Alison say Brit was _her _lab partner? Nothing made sense. I tried to find a reasonable explanation and failed.

When I opened my eyes, I didn't see Brit—I saw Callie, who had gotten together with Jacob over winter break last year behind my back. I'd forgiven Callie because I would never have started dating Eric if she hadn't done what she did. But now—now—I couldn't even think about losing Jacob again. And this time there was no Eric to fall back on.


	9. BoySnatcher

**I finally finished chapter nine! It took a few rewrites because I read my story over and realized it was getting really slow. So here it is, I hope you like it! Read and comment, your feedback is really important to me!**

**-MuseGoddess**

* * *

><p>Chapter Nine<p>

Boy-Snatcher

By the time Sunday night rolled around, I'd mostly forgotten about Brit's meeting with Jacob on Friday. All our homework was done, so we were just lounging around playing What Would You Rather when Brit's phone chimed.

She grabbed it, read the text, and then typed something back before getting up.

"So, what would you rather? A kiss from Andy or backstage passes to a One Direction concert?" **(A/N: MAJOR DIRECTIONER HERE!) **I repeated. "Wait, where are you going?"

Brit tossed her phone on her bed and grabbed her blue-and-black-striped towel. "I'm heading over to the library."

I sat up, knocking my unicorn Pillow Pet off my lap. It hit the floor with a thump. "On a Sunday night? No way."

"Yes way." Brit kicked off her size-eight sparkly gold flip-flops and twisted the round knob on the bathroom door. "Jacob is…he really…needs help on something."

"Oh?" I tried not to sound too disbelieving. "What?"

"Science." Brit said automatically. "Yeah, our, uh, lab is due tomorrow and he still hasn't finished."

"Bummer." I rolled over on my stomach as she disappeared into the bathroom. The lock clicked before the steady drum of water blasting from the showerhead started. I heard Brit singing "One Thing" over the pounding of the water.

Brit and Jacob had met up on Thursday, Friday, and were now meeting up again. Surely Mr. Cohen didn't assign that much homework—assuming that they were really partners. I grabbed my pink cell and texted Page, who was also in the advanced science class.

_U drowned in sci hw yet?_

She replied back, _No, almost none. Y do u ask?_

Suspicion rose up inside me, heavy and choking. _Just wondering, _I answered.

I slowly dropped my mascaraed gaze to Brit's striped bedspread, where her purple-encased BlackBerry sat, softly blinking. The flashes seemed to taunt me.

_Flash-flash-flash _

_ Flash-flash-flash_

_ Boy-snat-cher_

_ Boy-snat-cher_

I glanced at the bathroom door. Still securely locked. The shower was still on. I weighed the pros and cons of swiping Brit's phone—and right then, I could handle the cons.

I lunged for Brit's phone, making a mental note of where it was placed. Heart pounding underneath my sea-green tweed sweater, I ignored my conscience for the time being. My fingers shook as they turned the ringer to vibrate and entered her menu. I couldn't believe I really was doing this. Was I honestly sneaking into Brit's phone? And for what? Something I wasn't even sure existed—a relationship between Brit and Jacob.

_Jacob. _His name jolted me back to myself. I was not going to lose him again.

Four clicks later I was in her inbox.

_ Jacob Schwartz_

_ Jacob Schwartz_

_ Jacob Schwartz_

_ Jacob Schwartz_

_ Sasha Silver_

_ Alison Robb_

_ Ainslee Chan_

_ Andy Powell_

The screen ended there. I scrolled down a short way and saw Jacob's name several more times. They'd texted more—_way_ more—than I'd realized.

I took a yoga-style breath and quickly smoothed calming lemon gloss on my lips before clicking on Jacob latest message. It had been sent five minutes ago.

_Hey, do u want 2 meet the Slice? We can talk abt it then. Remember not 2 tell S! It would ruin everything._

I bit my lip, inhaling the citrusy scent of my gloss. What were they going to talk about? What would be ruined if I found out? ("S" had to be me.) What were my boyfriend and bestie keeping from me? There were too many questions and not enough answers.

I went back to Brit's inbox and clicked on the second message from Jacob, which had arrived in her inbox yesterday at 8: 32 PM.

_Thx again 4 helping me. Ur rlly cool. U sure S hasn't suspected anything? Mayb we can meet again 2moro._

Clearly Jacob really wanted to hide something from me, but not from Brit. What would require that kind of secrecy? My birthday had already passed. A surprise "Essex Fall Show" bash? Not likely. Brit was showing in Essex too, so it would've been kept secret from her.

I returned to her inbox and opened the third message. The timestamp read Thursday, 5:57 PM. It was short and stabbed me through the heart.

_I rlly want r date 2 b perfect. I'll text u l8r with the details. ~J_

My eyes burned and tears welled up behind my eyelids. I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes. I could barely see to go back to her inbox.

Suddenly I heard a click. The lock of the bathroom door! In all my misery I hadn't heard the water shut off. I pressed the end call button as fast as I could to return the phone to the home screen and tossed the BlackBerry away. It had barely hit her lilac-and-white striped comforter before the white door burst open and Brit, swathed in a supersoft pink robe, stepped out onto the fuzzy shag rug.

"You look jumpy," she said, studying me.

"Oh—I…was just waiting for a text from Jacob. I…think he's going to, um, ask me on a—ask me something."

I'd made it up on the spot, but she didn't look surprised—in fact, she looked like she expected it. Did she think that Jacob was going to break up with me already? He hadn't texted me at all since Tuesday.

My phone chimed. I scooped it up.

"Is that him?" Brit sounded almost excited—excited to see me break up with my boyfriend because that meant having Jacob to herself? I was shot through with feelings of betrayal.

"No." Brit looked disappointed—that Jacob hadn't broken it off? "It's Alison." I barely read the text—something about coming over at 7.

"So…ready for break?" Brit sat down in her purple swivel chair and grabbed her quilted blue makeup bag.

"Yeah." I said halfheartedly, but Brit was too busy plugging in her hairdryer to respond.

"I can't wait to see my parents. You?" Brit aimed the metallic blue dryer at herself and hit ON.

My stomach swirled. I was stuck. I couldn't confront Brit without revealing that I'd swiped her phone and I couldn't sleep soundly after having read her texts. I couldn't even openly feel sad because then Brit would ask what was wrong, then I'd have to tell her.

"Sash?"

"Oh—yeah. I didn't get to see them for fall break so I'm happy to be going home."

"I'll miss you, though." Brit flashed me a smile. I managed to return it without bursting into tears.

"And…done." Brit capped a bottle of cover-up and stood, striking a pose. "What do we think?"

She was wearing a stretchy white tee with a gold rhinestone pattern in the center, a deep blue three-quarters-sleeved suede jacket I'd never seen before, and tight gray flared jeans. The glossy black curls that tumbled around her shoulders were practically reflective and barely-there blush made her cheekbones look extra-sharp. Navy eyeliner ringed her brown eyes and smoky gray shadow made her eyes look even darker. Rosy pink gloss sparkled on her full lips.

"Whoa." I studied her. What did she have that Jacob liked? I knew Brit was prettier and more charismatic, but Jacob had always liked me for me. I did my best to hide my hurt. "You look awesome. Are you going on a date with Andy or something? I thought you were going to the library."

"I am, but…" she fidgeted with her one-buckle gold Coach clutch, "I'm doing something else after that."

_Yeah. Meeting my boyfriend for pizza._

"Oh. Have fun…studying."

Brit giggled, gave me a one-armed hug, and left. I walked to our full-length mirror and tried to imagine myself with black hair and bangs. It didn't look good on me. Just like my relationship with Jacob was looking now.


	10. Girl Talk

**I finally finished this chapter after many rewrites! It's a little boring but the next chapter is definitely more exciting. I'll try to upload a new chapter every Saturday, but I can't make any solid promises though : ( what with school and every thing**

**I love your feedback, please comment and tell me what you think!**

**-MuseGoddess**

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><p>Chapter Ten<p>

Girl Talk

Heather confronted me at lunch Monday the next day, detective-style. "What is going on?"

"Wh-what?" I blinked my lightly lined eyes at her in confusion, though I was pretty sure I knew what she was implying.

She crossed her tanned arms over her red-and-black Stella McCartney minidress. "What is going on?" she repeated, louder.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I said evasively. She just stared. I avoided her piercing gaze by brushing invisible lint off my favorite dark purple Delia's tee with the cute lace sleeves.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. Do I look blind?" Heather placed her hand on her hip, gold bangles tumbling down her arm.

I directed my next words to my caramel-colored Uggs. "No, you don't."

She opened her glossy mouth to respond, but was cut off by a dirty-blond high schooler in a faded red polo behind me. "Um, you're holding up the line."

Heather shot him a look, and the guy shut up.

"Do we really need to play that stupid guess—"

"Okay!" I threw up my hands. "Just let me pay."

"Fine." She tapped her black Marc Jacobs wedge on the white linoleum impatiently. I inched the black plastic tray along the two raised metal bars like an extremely breakable diamond vase. Heather tapped faster.

I reached the white-aproned cashier and handed over my student ID card. Once I'd paid, Heather grabbed my tray in one moisturized palm, my right hand in the other, and yanked me away like a claustrophobic in a stone tunnel. She sat me down at a round two-seater and plopped down across from me, still clutching my food. I immediately tugged the tray away from her, nails skidding across the black plastic, and shoved a cheese-soaked nacho in my mouth.

"Look." Heather rolled her sparkle-dusted eyes. "You didn't come to our suite last night to hang out, and neither did Brit. Then you come to the stable superearly—way before Brit does, like you want to avoid her. And you keep giving her the slip, so I _know_ you are avoiding her, which is like, rarer than Alison screaming. You have been disgustingly close, like, ever since she's arrived at Canterwood." Heather huffed. "Plus when Jacob waved at you just now you ignored him. What's up?"

"Nothing! Nothing's up," I said, _waayy_ too quickly. I bit my lip and stuffed my mouth with cheese. _Stop talking, Sasha!_

Heather tapped her heels against her chair's metal legs and sighed like someone delivering a punishment. "Do I honestly have to drag Brit here to—"

"Mnoh!" I swallowed with difficulty and grabbed her wrist. "No." Heather sat.

"Why do you even care, anyway?" I picked at the lace on my shirt.

"Because. You were totally off at YENT practice today and…well, you're my friend. Okay? And don't change the subject."

"Fine. But—but don't judge me or scream or anything." I rubbed my temples.

"I don't do that, but whatever. This better be good, Silver." Heather sat back and crossed her arms, flipping her highlighted blonde hair behind her impatiently.

I took a deep breath and then let it all out. "BritandJacobkeptmeetingupwit houtmeandsoIgotsuspiciousand readBrit' 'rekeepingsomethingfrommeandh e'stakingheroutonadateeventhou ghhe'sdating_me_andshe'saboy-snatcher!" I gasped for air and dropped my golden-brown head to the white plastic table.

Heather's mouth dropped open into a pink shiny _O_. _"You read her texts without her permission?"_

"You're missing the point!" I smacked the surface of the table frustratedly. I'd thought Heather of all people would understand, given that she'd hacked my email over break and had actually written my ex-almost-boyfriend. Like she could talk to me about honesty. "Brit and Jacob are _cheating_ on me!"

Luckily Heather had chosen a fairly secluded table, because that last part had come out pretty loud.

"Shh!" she whispered-hissed, and leaned closer to me, white-yarn-covered hoops swinging. "Are you sure?"

I nodded. "And I don't know what to do!" I bit my lip, feeling tears well up.

My former archnemesis placed a comforting French-manicured hand on my shoulder. "It's okay, Sasha."

I wiped away the black-tinted wetness on my cheeks. "Wow, that's like the first time you've used my real name."

We giggled softly. I ripped open a packet of red-and-yellow pepper flakes and dumped them on my nachos. "So what do I do?" I asked, dipping a chip in a pool of cheese sauce. Talking to Heather had definitely helped.

She chewed her full bottom lip. "You need proof before you confront them."

"Proof?" I popped open my Sprite. The soda seemed to hiss-agree with me. "I told you, her texts said—"

"No, I meant real proof. You obviously can't tell Brit you wiped her BlackBerry, so you need to provide some real, solid proof." Heather pointed at my Baked Lays. "Could I have some?"

"Oh—sure." I nodded. Heather ripped the yellow cellophane bag open and dumped a handful in her mouth.

"Like what kind of proof?" I gulped my soda and squeezed my eyes shut as the fizz burned my throat.

Heather crunch-chewed Lays. "I don't know. Maybe a picture?"

I wiped my fizz-burn-watering eyes and dried my hand on the purple cotton surface of my shirt. "How am I supposed to get a picture of them hanging out? Are you saying I should _stalk_ them?"

Heather snagged a nacho from my plate and moved her shoulders in a you-said-it-not-me shrug.

I gasped. "How creepy is that?"

Heather eyed me slyly. "Sasha the Stalker!" she giggle-blurted and burst out laughing.

"It's not funny," I said, tipping the blue-and-green Sprite can toward my candy-cane-glossed lips.

Heather stopped laughing and focused her blue eyes on me. "Do you have any other ideas?"

She was right, as usual.


	11. Mission Impossible

**Okay! Chapter eleven is finally uploaded. I was literally just about to upload it yesterday when my mom yanked me away.**

**Parents can be so annoying.**

**Anyway here it is and I worked hard on it and rewrote it so many times getting it perfect for you guys. Read and Comment! **

**-MuseGoddess**

* * *

><p>Chapter Eleven<p>

Mission Impossible

I wiped my sweat-slicked, grapefruit-scented palms on my jeans as best as I could with my knees slammed up against my chest, wondering if any information was worth this much discomfort. I mean, a girl had to draw lines somewhere. And if it wasn't for the insistent, slightly exasperated voice in my ear, I probably would have risen and walked back to Orchard. Back to wider walls. Back to air filters. Back to leg room.

Sandwiched between two extremely itchy hay bales, my back pressed against one and the toes of my black boots squish-stuffed at another, I was pretty sure I'd never been more uncomfortable. Not even when we'd picked up Aunt Sofia in Hartford to find out she'd brought a few "unexpected guests". Our compact SUV wasn't nearly big enough, and the hourlong ride back to Union had been torture. But at least we'd had air conditioning.

I drew in a big, calming, get-over-the-pain breath—and sneezed.

"Shhhh!" the Voice **(A.N. I love that show!)** snapped on the other end of the line. "You're so loud!"

"Suh-oh-_reee_," I snap-coughed, "but it's so dusty and scratchy and—ow!" Something lodged in my back. I stuffed a hand down my storm-gray parka and yanked out a pointy piece of blond straw.

"Ugh," I muttered, flicking it away.

"What was that?" the Voice (aka Heather) asked.

"Nothing," I lied, scooting forward to escape the bale smashed up against my back and accidentally ramming my toes into the other. It felt like my pedicure was locked in a trash compactor.

"Sasha, quit squirming!" Heather huffed. "I can hear you and I'm like, half a mile away in Orchard."

I bit back a retort. "'Kay, fine. But it's getting really squished over here and Brit hasn't moved. Like, at all. And why would they be meeting up here anyway? Jacob's afraid of horses." I eyed my dark-haired roommate, who was leaning beside the doorway looking increasingly frustrated.

I envy-scanned her outfit. Black skinny jeans tucked into caramel-colored riding boots, a cropped crimson leather jacket, and a thin waffle-knit white sweater underneath. Her silky black hair was in its customary neat side braid, looking just as glossy as her full shiny pink lips. If I didn't feel like cry-slash-punching something every time I saw her, I'd have asked her where she'd gotten that jacket and if I worked red. Most likely it was something super-expensive from the Barney's catalog.

"Well, you're there to find out, aren't you?" Heather oozed "duh."

I pushed my mirrored sunglasses (part of my spy disguise) up to my hair and peered closely at my BlackBerry's square-shaped screen. "Jacob's ten minutes late. I really don't think he's com—"

I never finished the sentence. The black stable door suddenly whipped open, a rush of cold air spilling into the warm building and cutting me off. I looked up and choked. My phone slid out of my hand and slammed into a pile of hay.

"Sasha? Sasha? What happened?" Heather's mildly annoyed tone had switched to growing worry, but I couldn't talk. I couldn't move. I couldn't even breathe. All I could do was stare blankly, my mouth hanging open.

Jacob stood there, the pale white winter sun backlighting him softly so he looked like an angel. My gaze floated from his worn black Converse, past his baggy Hurleys and gray Abercrombie pullover, to his tanned, handsome face. Cheeks red from cold, adorably windswept caramel hair a little tousled. I felt like hugging him, or lacing his cold fingers in mine. Instead I shrank deeper into the hay.

"Hey!" Brit finger-fluffed her black bangs and beamed at him.

"Hey." Jacob sounded less enthusiastic, which should've comforted me if I hadn't known it was because of horse phobia. He nervously eyed the horses poking their heads out of their stalls.

"So, ready to ride?" Brit casually dried her palms on her jeans, like a smear of ice cream she was discreetly wiping on a wall, and held her hand out to him.

"Not really." Jacob shoved his hands deeper into his hoodie pockets. "The stable looks busy. Maybe we should come back another time." He pulled his hands out of his pockets and started fiddling with the strings on his hoodie.

"But we don't have much time." Brit tilted her head. "Thanksgiving break is almost here."

"But there are tons of people. What if Sasha sees us?" Jacob argued.

"She won't." Brit looked certain. Seeing his doubtful expression, she sighed. "Look, I'll text her..." She pulled out her phone and keyed something in. A second later my phone vibrated.

I pulled it out and checked the screen

ONE NEW TEXT

I clicked READ.

_Where r u?_

_ Spying on you,_ I privately thought. But instead I wrote:

_Sweet Shoppe. Want me 2 bring u anything?_

I hit SEND. Brit's phone beeped and she held it up to Jacob. "See? She won't see."

"I don't know..." Jacob's gaze flicked uneasily to the horses walking up and down the aisles.

"Come on, it will be tons of fun. Promise!" She giggled flirtatiously and grabbed his hand, trying to tug him forward. Unfortunately, it looked kind of...adorable.

My stomach lurched. A vivid image popped into my brain—one of me exploding out of the hay and yelling, "Hands off!" like crazy, possessive freak.

_But that's sooo desperate, _I told myself. Not to mention the fact that I was actually _stalking my boyfriend_. I'd have to stay hidden. Just as I was coming to this conclusion, Brit looked over and said, "Sasha, are you there?"

I had the mental equivalent of a heart attack. A million thoughts raced through my head and my limbs froze up. Strangely her voice seemed to be coming from my left, like she was sitting next to me.

"Sasha, are you there?" a girl's voice repeated. My stomach jumped, but then I cocked my head slightly. That didn't sound like—

"Ohmygod," I relief-whispered. I turned my head slowly to my right, where a candy-pink rectangle sat bleating, "Sasha, are you there?"

_It's only Heather, _I thought.

"Ah-HEM, SA-sha Sil-VER, are you THERE?"

I quickly stretched out my index finger and slowly dragged it toward me. Then I hit end and dropped it into my parka pocket. At the moment I wasn't thinking of Heather's wrath. My eyes were fixed on the horrific sight in front of me.

"Are you sure?" Jacob half-jerked his head away when a palomino horse tied up in crossties neighed and stomped his white hoof. I gritted my teeth. The traitorous pig—I mean, Brit—was still holding his hand.

"Positive." Brit stepped closer to Jacob and leaned forward, going up on her tiptoes and leaning her head slightly right. My mouth dropped open like a locket and the world seemed to spin in slow, lazy circles. The only thing steady was of Brit placing her free hand on his shoulder, tipping closer to his lips...Jacob making no move to push her away as she...whispered something in his ear. My heart rate slowed down and I saw her lips form the word "Sasha."

My nose crinkled in confusion. What was she telling him? Well, whatever it was, it worked because he allowed himself to be led down the aisle and out of sight.

Mission two: Follow subjects.

I people-scanned, then heaved. My legs had fallen asleep, so I shook them out while brushing hay off my clothes. The stubborn straw refused to un-cling, so I just flipped up my hood, dropped my sunglasses over my face, and strode down the aisle looking like I'd just used my clothes to groom a horse.

I reached the end of the hall in time to see the tack room door swing shut. So they were going riding. Why though? I'd only seen Jacob on a horse once—on our Halloween Trail Ride in October, two weeks ago. And that was for me. A chilling thought hit me—what if Jacob had _replaced _me?

The door swung open and I quickly bent down, pretending to take a drink from the water fountain. Brit and Jacob left and headed down the aisle. I followed them and hid in some random stall while they groomed Apollo and a school horse I recognized as York, a friendly black gelding with a white blaze.

I watched as Jacob took a dandy brush Brit handed him and tentatively moved it across York's back in short, jerky movements. Brit laughed, and I could hear her across the aisle.

"No, like this!" She smiled and closed her slender fingers over Jacob's brush hand, gently correcting his strokes. I turned away and slid my glasses over my face to block them out. But Brit's laugh and Jacob's chuckle I could hear loud and clear.

Unfortunately, I could hear the next things loud and clear too.

"Um, what are you doing in my horse's stall?"

Cheeks on fire, I turned around. A pretty seventh-grader with long, super-straight blond hair stared at me, her whitish eyebrows crinkled. She had a mound of tack in her arms. I recognized her as one of Rachel's friends, who I'd dubbed "The Crush Girls" while I was dating Eric.

"I..." Why me? "I, um, dropped my body brush. In your stall." Thank god I was wearing sunglasses.

"Body brush?" The girl's gaze drifted to my feet, where there was nothing but straw. I quickly bent and closed air into my palm, and stuffed my hand into my pocket.

"Yeah. I'm sorry." I pushed through the stall door and almost sprinted out. The girl jumped aside, brown eyes wide. My cheeks flamed and I walked out into the middle of the hall.

She threw another confused glance at me, but then turned and started grooming her horse. I opted this time to duck beside a tack trunk and pretend to fiddle with my boot.

This day was just getting more embarrassing by the second. If I had any sense I'd turn around and go back to my dorm. Do my homework. Maybe get something at the Sweet Shoppe like I'd said I did. But instead I was crouched here, spying on my BFF and BF, risking my credibility just to...what was my mission here again? I combed my memory. Snap a picture of the two of them together or something.

I didn't have to squat long. Brit and Jacob (well, mostly Brit) finished tacking up Apollo and York. She handed York's reins to Jacob and led the way through the press of riders and horses.

I got up and followed them like a balloon pulled by a toddler. I sidestepped a pair of chattering girls and managed to catch the edge of the side door they'd left through.

Hauling myself out of the warm stuffy stable, I stepped into the cold. The ground was frozen, the grass dripping with melted frost. I pulled up my hood and steam puffed from my mouth.

Brit and Jacob were entering the mouth of one of my favorite trails. I pulled out my BlackBerry, thumbed to camera, and snapped a picture. The photo popped up and I examined the grainy pic. Even with their backs turned, it was obvious who they were.

The snap, though, had carried through the freezing air. Brit halted Apollo and heeled him around to face where I stood, frozen, my phone still clutched in my hand in picture position. Jacob tried to copy her but couldn't quite turn York.

We stared at each other for a second. My glasses were huge and the hoodie covered most of my hair, so there was a slim chance she recognized me. Her eyebrows crinkled up in confusion. "What the..." she started. Then she realized I'd snapped a photo. "Wait a sec!" She called, cantering Apollo toward me.

I yanked open the heavy door with more strength than I thought I had, diving inside and melting easily into the crush of bodies and horses. I heard the door open again behind me, but I didn't dare look back. I shoved through the stable crowd and reached the front doors.

I leaned against them hard. They whipped open and I threw myself out. I heard a faint girl's voice, "Wait!" but I sprinted away from the stable and away from every horrible thing I'd seen.


	12. Through the Grapevine

**So here is the twelfth chapter, my lovelies!**

**I'd been writing the story for a while and then realized I only had a few days in the story to fit everything I'd planned before the characters had to leave for Thanksgiving. So if you were wondering, yes, that's why I'm action-cramming.**

**The story is also coming to a close. There are only going to be a few more chapters after this-four at most. Maybe an epilogue, though I don't know what I'd write in that. As I said, the characters are going to be leaving for Thanksgiving and the story was designed to take place in Canterwood only.**

**Halloween is only in ten more days! EEEEKK! I mean, free candy. It can't get better than that. I will be a butterfly this year, yay! You are never too old to dress up.**

** Read and comment!**

**-MuseGoddess **

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><p>Chapter Twelve<p>

Through the Grapevine

My boots thumped hard against the icy sidewalk as I raced away from the stable. I held on to my hood as I pushed past people, afraid it would fly off and reveal my hair. My identity was the only thing Brit didn't have now.

I stopped in the middle of the courtyard and turned. No one was following me, but that didn't mean anything.

I pulled up the picture and stared at it. Their postures suggested familiarity, easiness, even maybe attraction. I stuffed the phone away, overcome with an overwhelming desire to smash any evidence the Brit and Jacob might be together.

Where to now? I needed comfort. Jacob was definitely not an option—he was the cause of my angst.

Charm? Definitely he could calm me. But there was no way I was going back to that stable until I cooled down.

My room? Maybe. I could definitely use some hot milk, warmth...plus there was the ginormous pile of homework waiting for me. But no. Brit could've returned there, and there was no way I could look her in the face and pretend to be okay. There was only one place left.

I cut across the courtyard and behind the science building, keeping hidden eyes peeled for any sign of my roommate. I briefly debated moving out, maybe in with Paige or Heather and Alison, but then I'd have to tell Brit why. And talking to her was out of the question.

Five minutes later I'd entered Orchard through Stephanie's private door, returning the key under the rock she kept it under. I walked carefully through my dorm, but no one recognized me. Brit wasn't present either. I wondered if she'd returned to go riding with Jacob, or was still trying to find the mysterious paparazzi.

I knocked on a door. It opened a crack. "Can I help you?" a voice hissed.

"Yeah." I pulled down the glasses. "It's me."

Heather pulled open the door, snapping her watermelon Bubblicious. She wore comfy purple velour pants and a stretchy white tee. From the gray eraser residue on her shirt, I guessed she'd been doing homework.

"So." Heather sat me down on her bed and pulled my Ray-Bans off my face. "I can tell by your expression Operation Stalker didn't go so well. Want to tell me what happened?"

Wordlessly I pulled out my BlackBerry, thumbed to the pic, and handed it to her. She didn't say anything for a long time.

I could feel her gaze on me. Gently, she asked, "Do you still want to talk?" She didn't even mention me hanging up on her without warning.

I stared at my cold hands. Heather didn't press me. I let out a big breath.

"He came," I said hollowly.

"You don't have to tell me," Heather started, but I shook my head. I needed to get it all out before they ate me up inside. "I didn't realize—how close they were. They've been hanging out way more than I actually realized. How could I have missed it?" I asked Heather, chewing on my bottom lip. "Another thing—how could Brit not tell me? I would be fine if she hung out with Jacob. Totally fine!"

"Yeah, about that," Heather began, twisting her blond hair nervously. "I, um, asked around. Brit isn't—never was Jacob's science lab partner." She side-glanced me.

"Oh." Another lie. I'd always suspected it, but hearing it from Heather was equal to a punch in the gut.

We sat in silence for a while. I stared at the rerun of _Pretty Little Liars _playing mutely on the Trio's plasma screen without seeing anything. _Brit is a pretty little liar, _I thought. _Prettier than me…which is why Jacob left to be with her instead of me…_

I pulled a piece of horsehair off of my jeans. "And, um, Heather," I started. "Could I stay in your—in the—well, like sleep over? Just for tonight. I mean, I don't think I could—with things between Brit and I being what they are—if you don't want to it's okay...I guess I could always sleep at Paige's—"  
>"Omigod, would you stop talking already? You're welcome to sleep over," Heather said. Then she leaned closer and added, "And if you tell anyone this I will make sure your life is over, but—" she swallowed "—it's kinda been a little...lonely, with only Alison and me. Without Julia." She stared at the closed door of Julia's former room for a second, sadness in her clear blue eyes. But it was like her emotions were on a switch—one <em>flick <em>and she was back to sassy, snarky Normal Heather.  
>"Okay, so that was like a lame Dr. Phil episode." She stood and grabbed her phone. "I'm texting Alison to stop by the Sweet Shoppe and pick up cupcakes or something. We are getting you <em>out <em>of this funk." Seeing my face she said, "Hey, it's going to be alright. We'll have fun tonight. You still haven't seen the new Bryce Oliver movie. And I'm having a serious talk with Brit tomorrow. That girl is messed up." She tapped at her BlackBerry's keypad impatiently, muttering to herself.  
>"And Sasha..." she smirked, "you might wanna change out of those straw covered clothes. Just a suggestion."<p>

I looked down at my black spy clothes-dusty and covered with stalks of hay. "Good idea," I murmured, heading out.

I hurried back toward my dorm, praying Brit wasn't back yet. The last thing I needed was for her to look me in the eye and say she was still my friend after all her lies. I didn't know if I'd explode, burst into tears, or call the police for theft. All I was sure of was that I wasn't going down without a fight.

Which was pretty pathetic. The logical thing to do was fight for Jacob—but how to do that when even thinking about him was painful?

I reached my dorm and slowly slipped my key into the lock. My brain kept creating scenarios that could happen if Brit was on the other side of the door, each one more horrifying than the last. I wondered vaguely—if I opened the door and found Brit and Jacob making out on the other side, what would I do? For the first time I was grateful for Stephanie's no-boys-allowed-in-Orchard rule.

I pumped the handle once and pushed the door open, which swung open noiselessly. I stood stock-still at the threshold, green eyes flitting across the length of the room warily. Nobody. I examined the muddy rug beside the door where Brit and I kept our riding boots. Only one pair remained—mine. I stepped in and locked the door securely behind me.

I shimmied out of my dirty clothes and tossed them in a wadded-up heap at the laundry basket. I locked myself in the bathroom and turned on the water. The hot water felt good on my straw-covered body. I washed the dust from my arms and hair, watching the brownish water swirl down the drain.

I stood there until my fingers started pruning. Then I stepped out and wiped down my shiny-clean body. I opened the bathroom door, letting loose an avalanche of steam. Still no Brit. I blew out my hair only halfway, just so wet strands wouldn't run down my back. I changed quickly into a sky-blue cotton tee, heather-gray sweatpants and a white sweater. Checked my phone for "I'm late" or "I'm cheating with your boyfriend" messages from my AWOL roommate. Nothing.

That was better, I guessed. I'd have no idea how to respond. I grabbed my overnight bag from behind the shoes in my closet, pulling it open. I filled it with a few handfuls of clothes and zipped it shut. I quickly packed up my school things and slung the bags over my shoulder.

The halls were noticeably more crowded when I stepped out, carefully locking up behind me. I set off for Heather and Alison's room, trying not to hit people with my stuff in the close quarters and keeping a sharp eye out for the one person I didn't want to see.

As I passed the entrance to the common room I stopped suddenly. Someone pushed into me accidentally and shot me a frustrated look before hurrying off. I inched closer to a cluster of girls talking in the corner. I'd heard a really familiar name...

"And then Brit gave me advice on intermediate testing!" a brunette with long, curly chestnut hair said.

"You're sooo lucky, Kayla. She's the best dressage rider on the eighth-grade YENT team," her petite blond friend said. I recognized her as the one who'd caught me in her horse's stall earlier. A blush spread on my cheeks, and I hid my face in my hood. Sometimes it felt like my whole life was a game of hide-and-spy.

"Plus she's really pretty," a tall, auburn-haired girl pointed out.

"That's so true, Ashley! She could get any guy she wanted." the blonde sighed.

I rolled my eyes and started to walk away.

"Speaking of guys, did you hear she has a new boyfriend?" Kayla asked.

I froze and turned around slowly. Ashley gasped.

"So not fair! Half the guy riders in my math class already want to date her," she whined, flipping her dark red hair over one shoulder.

"What's his name, Kay?" the blonde asked.

"So you know that really hot eighth-grade football player, Cass?" Kayla began.

"Which one?" snorted Ashley.

Cass smirked. Kayla continued. "The one with light brown hair and green eyes. Jacob Schwartz!"

I nearly had a hernia. Unaware to my choking, Kayla continued. "I saw them at the Sweet Shoppe, sharing a plate of cookies. And no," she said, cutting off Ashley, "there were no books between them, so they weren't studying."

Cass' eyes widened. "Oh I remember! I was at the stable and saw them trail riding!"

"See," Kayla smiled.

Ashley pursed her lips thoughtfully. "Wait, doesn't Jacob have a girlfriend?"

"N—" Kayla started, but Cass cut her off.

"Yeah! Sasha Smith or something. She's on the YENT too."

I was too busy listening in to be offended at the name mix-up.

"So he can't be dating Brit," Ashley corrected, a tad smugly.

"No," Kayla persisted, "Natalie saw them kissing."

I made a really loud choking sound. Cass looked at me, part concerned and part weirded out. Before she could say anything Ashley kept talking.

"What does Natalie know?" she scoffed.

"Get this, Ash. She was walking by the science building when she saw Brit talking to Jacob's rider friend Andy. He said something and Brit replied, "I'm sorry, I can't." She's broken up with him to be with Jacob!" Kayla's voice had risen to a near shout.

That was it. I turned and pushed through the crowd in the common room, a weird combination of sniffling and sobbing escaping me. My flailing bags smashed into some people, but I couldn't hear them over the ringing in my ears.

I never wanted to see Brit, not now, not tomorrow, not ever again.


	13. Phones, Computers, and the - - -

**Okay, my lovelies! ****I finally posted! Yay! **

**I was busy creating a new story and totally FORGOT about Secrets. Harsh, right? **

**I didn't proofread, so sorry for any typos. BTW if you find one comment me, kay?**

**Read and comment!**

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><p>Chapter Thirteen<p>

Phones, Computers, and the People Who Hate Them

I'd almost calmed down when I reached the Trio's suite, trapping my sadness and crushing it until it almost didn't exist. I could sense something about to go wrong that needed my full attention, and I had to be there for my friends.

I twisted the knob and stepped inside. Heather and Alison looked up.

"We were waiting for you to start the movie," Heather informed me.

"Than—" I started, but something in my bag vibrated. I pulled out my BlackBerry, which was buzzing madly. The caller ID read BRIT. I hit IGNORE and dropped the phone back into my bag.

"She never stops. Can't she take a hint?" I kicked the bag underneath my chair.

Heather looked up from her MacBook. "You'll need to answer her, you know."

"Why would I ever—" I started.

Heather cut me off impatiently. "She'll know something's up. When's the last time you've ever not answered her calls?"

She had a point. "I guess you're right, but I can't talk to her. I'm not capable of that yet. When I do it will be to confront her about Jacob."

"How will you call her then? Just dial, and not say anything?" Heather rolled her eyes

I shrugged. "Never said it would be easy."

"I could talk to her, or Heather," Alison offered, twirling her sandy brown hair. "I could say you were in the bathroom. Then you'd hear everything but not talk to her."

"Maybe you're onto something." I stood, turning to face the Trio. Just at that moment, my phone went off again.

"Perfect timing," Heather commented, pushing past me. She leaned down and grabbed my phone, bringing it to her ear.

"Hey Brit…yes, she's here but she can't exactly come to the phone right now. Yeah, she's out, um, grabbing snacks in the common room," Heather lied. "Okay…what did you call for anyway? Oh yeah, she's sleeping over with us—me and Alison." Heather listened for a while as I paced anxiously in front of her. "Why would she be mad? Okay, I'll ask. See you tomorrow morning at the stable…what? No morning lessons? Why—oh okay, I remember. Thanks, I'll pass on the message. Def. Bye." Heather ended the call and sat.

"What?" I nearly exploded out of my head. "What did she say to you?"

"Yeah, H, spill," Alison added.

"Well" —Heather twisted her mouth like she was debating what to say— "she said that there were no morning lessons tomorrow."

"I got that, thanks. What else?" I stopped pacing to face Heather.

"Um…"

"Heather! Seriously!" Alison and I said together.

"Something about a photo," Heather said cautiously.

"And?" I pushed.

"She asked if you were mad at her, and she asked me to ask you if you'd seen any weird photos lately. That's it, okay? What were you waiting for, a letter of

pology? Geez." Heather rubbed her temples.

I compared her words with what she'd said on the phone and nodded. "Okay. So she still doesn't know it was me who took the photo?"

"No, not yet, obvi." Heather picked up her laptop and typed.

"When are you going to confront her? Before Thanksgiving?" Alison pulled out a nail file and began work on her nails.

"I don't know. Probably before. I wouldn't want to carry this thing through break."

"I hear you," Alison said.

Across the room, Heather's face tightened. She pressed a button with obvious force and her lined blue eyes narrowed.

"H? What's up?" I went over to sit by her. Alison walked over and perched on the sofa armrest on her other side.

She closed the window. "Personal space, Silver. You too, Ali." She got up and shut her laptop.

Alison grabbed the laptop from her and pulled up the lid, bringing up the window. I peered over Alison's shoulder. It was the Gmail homepage.

"What is it?" I asked Heather. She pressed her lips together but gave away nothing.

"Give me my laptop." Her voice was flat.

Alison ignored her and moved the mouse over to the box that read, THE CONVERSATION HAS BEEN MOVED TO THE TRASH box. She clicked UNDO.

An email popped up, from the address jules_myer1998 . Alison clicked on it.

_From: jules_myer1998 _  
><em>To: heather_foxoxo27 <em>  
><em>Subject: Sorry<em>  
><em>Heather—<em>  
><em> Hey. If you haven't heard, I'm at Wellington. I sent you a text, and you didn't respond. But I know you got it, because I got texts from Sasha and Brit.<em>  
><em>I just wanted to email you to say I am really sorry about all I did. Not because I got kicked out of Canterwood. I do see now what I caused and how it affected you. And I was a bad friend. I know.<em>  
><em> Maybe you haven't forgiven me yet, and I don't blame you. I was horrible. But please email me or text me. Just to say you don't want to talk, even. I just want to explain. I didn't get to even apologize or explain before. I'll be on Skype at 8 tomorrow if you ever change your mind.<em>  
><em> And, maybe this isn't the right time to tell you this, but I need to say it. Jasmine (yes, King) isn't all that bad of a person. I know you think of her as mean and vindictive but that's because you haven't gotten to know her. If you see her at Essex just think about what I said (Brit told me). Good luck, BTW.<em>

_-J_

I could see Julia in my mind's eye as she struggled to compose the email. I pictured her leaning over the computer, pushing her blond bob back frustratedly, a frustrated frown on her glossed lips.

Alison opened her mouth to say something when the laptop was snatched from her hands. Heather closed it. "Don't you know going through someone's mail is a federal crime?"

"Did you even read it?" I asked.

"Read what?" Heather feigned ignorance, but her voice shook.

"Her email. Why'd you delete it?" Alison cut in.

Normally, peace-loving Alison would stay out of a fight or try to calm it down, but I completely understood. Julia was her best friend.

"I'm not friends with people who lie." Heather said, her voice flinty.

"She's trying to apologize. At least read it," I pressed.

She stared at me. "I thought we were over this."

"It was never over. She's trying to apologize. The day you make up with her—and I know you will-you'll regret that you never replied," I told her.

Heather turned away, but I saw that she was thinking over what I'd said. I trusted her, and hoped someday she'd finally find it in her heart to forgive Julia.

"Okay!" Alison piped up, trying to break the awkward silence. "How about we turn on the movie?"

Heather and I nodded. Alison got up and slid the movie into the DVD player.

It started, and we settled into the couch, munching popcorn. I tried to focus on the movie, I really did. But all I could think about was Jacob. And Brit. Together. As I watched, the male lead's face turned into Jacob's as the actor took the female lead's hand, whose face morphed into Brit's. As I watched, the two actors leaned in.

"Um, okay," I blurted, standing up. I blinked and the screen abruptly turned into a close up of Dianna Agron. "I'm, um, really tired. It's getting late...See you guys tomorrow!"

"'Kay," Alison said, still focused on the movie. Heather gave me a concerned look.

"I'm fine, really. Night guys." I shut myself in Julia's old room before she could respond. The windows faced out over campus. The moon was bright, washing white light over the peaceful grounds.

I pulled the curtains shut and sat on the bed. My phone sat on the nightstand, blinking softly. I grabbed it and turned it on.

I turned to the Pictures menu and started flipping through the shots. I knew it would probably make me feel worse but I couldn't help it.

The first one was a shot of Brit doing her homework, black hair in a messy bun. The next one showed Charm pacing in his stall. Next, one of Jacob at football practice. Then one of me and Brit on date night, followed by a shot of the cute blue skirt on Express's website that I really wanted.

I kept flipping through. Charm, a really good shot of Jacob taken by Brit that was currently my menu screen, the sun peeking over the campus at dawn, and...there it was. The latest shot. Brit and Jacob riding together down the lonely trail. Without me.

Suddenly sick inside, I put down the phone, changed, and climbed into bed. I prayed for sleep to come quickly, but it still felt like I was holding back Niagara Falls. I pressed my hands to my face but there they were, flowing down my cheeks. A shaky sob escaped me. I heard a muffled "Shhhh!" and the sound of the TV being muted. I turned over and buried my face in a pillow. It took me a second to realize it was the exact same shade of green as Jacob's eyes.  
>I flung it away, wishing sleep would come already.<p>

* * *

><p>I was standing on my favorite trail. Ahead of me two horses trotted gaily with two riders on their backs. Brit and Jacob.<p>

I ran toward them, but they let Apollo and Larky into canters. I tried to call out, but my voice didn't work.

A nudge at my side, and Charm looked up at me with large brown eyes. I swung myself up and urged him forward. He bounded toward them, eating up the ground. Somehow he flew between them and stopped, blocking the trail with his chestnut barrel, foreleg-deep in the creek.

I looked at Jacob first. He had jeans under a green henley. My subconscious had remembered him perfectly. If anything, he looked cuter, like he had been exfoliated and spit-shined. Suddenly the accusatory words on my tongue melted with the Jacob Effect.

Brit looked even better. Her black hair blew out behind her in a rippling wave even if there wasn't any wind, and her hand right hand was locked with Jacob's left. Her makeup was flawless. Her skin was clear and emitted a faint glow, like she'd just come from a full-day spa treatment. She wore bright red lipstick, which she never did usually because she said it made her look tacky. But the loving look Jacob gave her said it was anything but.

I dropped my gaze down to the creek and winced. Reflected in the water was my face, like looking in a mirror. I could see every imperfection—my too-big nose, frizzy hair that couldn't decide between blond and brown, the trio of zits on my forehead. Compared to Brit my reflection was almost pitiful.

"Why?" I managed to cry out, but they were already galloping away. Charm dissolved, and I landed with a muddy splash in the creek, alone and abandoned.


	14. Hide and Spy (Part Two)

**Two updates in one day! I originally typed this to be part of Ch. 13 but decided to split them up so...you would have gotten both anyways. Oops. Its a short chapter though-only one page on Word. **

**After this there will be two more chapters and an epilogue. So Secrets is almost over.**

**Read and comment, and eat plenty of carrots!**

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><p>Chapter Fourteen<p>

Hide-And-Spy (Part Two)

I woke with a start. I was back in bed. For a second I looked, confused, at the unfamiliar room before realizing. I was in the Trio's.  
>It had all been a dream. No—not a dream. A nightmare. An omen, maybe. But things were already horrible. I didn't think they could get any worse.<br>The thought wasn't pleasant.  
>Someone knocked on the door. Heather's voice wafted in. "Wake up, Silver."<br>"Coming," I managed. The clock read eight oh seven.  
>I pulled on skinny jeans, a nondescript white tee, and gray Ugg boots. It was the most inconspicuous outfit I had. I pulled my hair into a low ponytail that would fit under the hood of my plain blue Hollister hoodie. Hopefully Brit wouldn't recognize me.<br>Trailing behind Heather and Alison on our way to breakfast, I noticed how their postures screamed _On top and I know it. _They walked confidently, chins up, eyebrows slightly raised. Lips pursed, faces disinterested in their surroundings. They walked without sidestepping, like they expected everyone to make way. Which they did. Make way, I mean. People stared like they were lit with a bright spotlight, but Heather and Alison brushed by like they didn't exist.  
>Instead of joining them, I shrunk back into the shadows.<p>

I said goodbye to the Trio after a breakfast of French toast and two-percent milk. Well, Heather and Alison had eaten. I'd pushed the golden-brown syrupy bread around on my plate like I was playing wall hockey.  
>The minute I entered Mrs. Utz's first-period math class I instantly felt my muscles tense. Brit sat near the front, talking quietly on her phone. I couldn't make out the words. Normally I'd sit in the seat she'd saved me—I spotted her Prada messenger bag occupying the seat beside her—but this was hardly a normal day. I slunk to the back and pulled my hood lower over my eyes. Seriously. I couldn't live my whole life playing hide-and-seek with people who didn't even know we were playing.<br>The time until my free second period seemed to inch by. I just wanted to get out of there. Finally, the bell rang and the room filled with people. I crammed the books in my bag and raced for the door, only to find it jam-packed with other students. If I had been a little faster. I would have missed the whole thing.  
>Instead, I watched silently as Brit slipped on a guy's math homework. Her bag fell and split, spilling books everywhere. The guy quickly apologized and bent to grab Brit's pen bag. As he did so, his foot sent a Brit's purple notebook skidding toward me.<br>And then, I don't know why, but I grabbed it and shoved it into the inner pocket of my hoodie. It fit easily—the notebook was one of those smalle ones. And though it wasn't even very heavy, it felt like a thousand pounds of guilt.


	15. The Notebook (Not the Movie)

**Happy December 5th, MY PUMPKINS! According to the Mayan calendar the world should end in a week.**

**Or maybe on the 21st, idk, I'm confused.**

**Anyways I lied. This is not the second to last chapter, there will be like two more. So sorry.**

**Read and comment!**

**PS did you know that OK is a man doing jumping jacks sideways? Just putting that out there.**

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><p>Chapter Fifteen<p>

The Notebook (Not the Movie)

The sounds of running water and random chatter in the math building's girls' bathroom drowned the sound of flipping pages. I sat crisscross applesauce on the third stall's toilet seat cover and opened the purple notebook.

I recognized Brit's neat writing at once. It filled page after page in different color pens, sometimes in pencil, until about halfway through the book. I saw sketches of horses, places, even people. Brit was a great artist. I fingered a drawing of a horse that was unmistakably Apollo, captured with a few strokes of green pen.

The bathroom door banged open, and I dropped the notebook in surprise. It bounced once and slumped open to a page marked with a gold ribbon bookmark. Ignoring the sticky floor, I reached down and picked it up.

I meant to return to the other page, but when I spotted the name 'Jacob' at the top of the page, my eyes felt like they had been Superglued there.

_—got a call from Jacob today. He told me that he—_

I scanned the rest of the page, but the ink had ran from the soggy bathroom floor. I flipped the page.

_—felt horrible when he asked me to because I knew Sasha would feel terrible. I remember she told me about last year, how the exact same thing had happened. But I really, really like him. He's so sweet and funny. But what would Sasha say?_

My jaw dropped. Jacob had already asked her to be his girlfriend? He hadn't even broken up with me yet! And I did remember telling Brit about last year, how Callie had fallen for Jacob when things between him and I were rocky. Now the exact same thing was happening now.

I turned back a few pages, searching for—aha! There. Scribbled in black pen, a few pages behind the first passage were the words:

_I felt really bad from the look on Andy's face. But I just couldn't lie to him. This might break off our new relationship but I had to tell him. It was the right thing to do._

I covered my mouth with my free hand. Oh my god! Brit had already told Andy about her and Jacob? So soon? They weren't even official!

Sad as I was, I couldn't help but feel bad for Andy. This had to be as hard on him as it was on me. I thought back to when I'd overheard Kayla in the common room yesterday, telling her friends all about how Natalie had heard Brit and Andy break up with the words "I'm sorry, but I can't." How could Brit be this cruel?

I started to read more, but the third-period bell rang. I shoved the diary in my bag and slung my bag over my shoulder, mind reeling. When I reached English I could barely function. Sentences from Brit's diary kept flashing through my head._ Got a call from Jacob today...Sasha would feel terrible...so sweet and funny...the look on Andy's face...I just couldn't lie to him...couldn't lie...couldn't lie..._

"Sash?" Paige, sitting beside me, touched my arm lightly. "Are you okay? For a second you looked a little...sick."

"I'm fine," I told her, but I was lying. The words on the page kept swimming until every other word looked like _Jacob_.

Or maybe that was just my tears.


	16. Confession

**Wow, I did a lot of updates. **

**Well, here is chapter 16! Secrets is almost over! My baby is growing up! : '( **

**Kidding.**

**Read and Comment!**

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><p>Chapter Sixteen<p>

Confession

After English was lunch. I ignored the Trio's texts to meet them at the caf for spaghetti though. My _heart _felt like spaghetti after all I'd found out.  
>I walked to Orchard alone. The campus was empty, everyone heading inside to escape the freezing cold air. I didn't see anyone.<br>Orchard Hall was half-full of girls. I kept my hand tightly around the purple notebook. I knew it was wrong, but I planned to read more of it in the safety of my dorm room.  
>My first mistake. When I clicked the key in the lock and pushed the door open, I saw that I wasn't alone.<br>"Sasha!" Brit cried, leaping up from her bed. "I didn't see for the last few days and I thought that—" She stopped when she got a look at my face. "Sash? Are you..."  
>I didn't say anything. Everything I'd been preparing to hurl at her seemed to dissolve where they'd been sitting in a heavy cube at the tip of my tongue. I was pretty sure my face was frozen in shock.<br>"I came here to find my diary because I couldn't find it after math class," she explained. "But it isn't here, so do you want to go get lunch or something?"  
>"I—can't," I managed to say past the lump in my throat. I hadn't been aware just how much I'd missed Brit. Studying with her, having random pillow fights, watching movies...it was all like the Jacob Mess had never happened. But it had, and I was working up the nerve to say something when Brit spoke.<br>"Oh, that's okay, I'm not really hungry ei—" She broke off suddenly. "Sasha, what are you holding?"  
>"What?" I looked down and gasped. I hadn't realized I was still holding the notebook. "I, um...see, I kinda found it on the floor after class—and I picked it up but I didn't—"<br>"That's my diary!" Brit gasped. "Did you—you didn't _read _it did you?"  
>"I—not exactly but—" I lie-stuttered.<br>"Oh my god you _did_!" Brit shouted. "You read it? Why would you—don't you know you're not supposed to—I write all my most personal—I trusted you!"  
>That's when it all blew up.<br>"You thought you couldn't trust _me?" _I yelled. the past week's anger and frustration bubbling out of me like an open soda can strapped to a roller coaster. "Oh, you can trust me, but apparently I can't trust you!"  
>"I—what are you talking about?" Brit stuttered, but her face turned a shade paler.<br>"Do you really think I wouldn't notice?" I told her. "Why would you ever do this? You were my best friend!"  
>"Sasha, I have no idea what you're talking about." She lied.<br>"You're cheating with Jacob! What happened to Andy? Are you a one-night-stand type of girl?"  
>Brit flinched. "Sasha, why would you think that?"<br>I half-laughed. "Why? You and Jacob go out for pizza, text about hiding secrets from me, trail ride—"  
>Brit's eyes widened. "You know about the photo?"<br>"I took the photo!" Brit's mouth hung open as she processed that tidbit of information. I continued. "But that's not all. You broke up with Andy because Jacob's such a 'sweet and funny' guy?" I quoted. "But he has a girlfriend. Me! And 'what would Sasha say?' Well, she'd say stop trying to get things you'll never have."  
>I stopped, breathing hard, glaring at Brit with eyes full of anger. What she said next, though, totally surprised me.<br>"I am keeping a secret from you, but it isn't the one you think." She said this like she was holding back something, and her mouth was set in a hard line. "It actually is for you, and everything I did was to help you."  
>"Why—" I started, completely turned around. I still felt angry, but I didn't know where to direct the hate.<br>"And I was writing about _Andy," _she told me. "I wrote that _Andy _was sweet and funny and that I would hurt _Andy's _feelings."  
>"How would you hurt his—"<br>"He asked me on a midnight trail ride!" Brit burst out, completely exasperated. "You weren't supposed to read that. I didn't want to tell you. It sounded so romantic—riding together under the moonlight—but we'd be breaking so many rules. And after all that stuff you told me about last year, how you got in so much trouble for midnight riding with the Belles, I knew you'd be totally against it. So I told Andy no. He looked really sad and hurt and I was worried it would mess up our relationship. You read that, didn't you?" Brit glanced at me and nodded. "You did. But you didn't read the part where I explained why." Brit sat down. "You can trust me. I can't believe you even said what you did."  
>I paced around, head spinning. "But why were you and Jacob always—"<br>"He was going to take you on a special date before you left for break!" Brit exclaimed. "It involved taking you to a special spot on the trail, so I had to help him set it up and you know about his horse fear and everything. And all those times you saw us together, we were planning your date." Brit shook her head.  
>I sat down hard. It all made perfect sense. Andy had looked sad because she'd refused to go out with him. I had told her all about the Belles and the horrible things they'd made the then-seventh-grade advanced riding team do. And planning a special date for me was a perfectly legit reason to spend time with Jacob. How—how had I managed to see everything exactly the opposite of what had really happened? And Brit...How could I have said all those things to my best friend when all she'd been really doing was trying to help me?<br>"I—I'm really sorry about—" I started, but the words died when I looked around the empty dorm room. Brit was gone.


	17. Cross-Country

**Okay, my lovelies! I updated! I really want to finish Secrets, but I'm also kind of sad it's over. This is a nice long chappie-seven pages on Word. Hope you like it! **

**Read and comment!**

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><p>Chapter Seventeen<p>

Cross-Country

I trudged along the path to the stables. The afternoon sky was cold and gray, covered by thick clouds that looked like they could burst into rain any second.

I knew how they felt.

How could I accuse my best friend of cheating on me? I'd hurled absolutely low things at her. Would she ever forgive me? I had no idea. Everything I'd flung at her was ugly and unforgivable. And what made it all the worse is that she had been trying to set up the perfect last day before break. I regretted everything I'd ever told her. I winced. My stomach hurt at the thought of breaking into Brit's phone, stalking her and Jacob on the trail, stealing her diary...with each addition I felt more and more like smacking myself.

Charm nickered when I reached his stall. I stepped inside and put my arms around his neck.

"I'm despicable," I whispered to him. "I yelled at Brit today about cheating when she was just planning a surprise date for me."

Charm gave me a look like, _How could you?_

"I know," I told him. "I need to fix it. But do you think I should just give her some space? Maybe she needs it."

Charm blinked, long and slow, and I nodded at him. "I'll talk to her after the lesson. Maybe she'll listen. But I can't blame her—it was all utterly my fault."

Charm bobbed his head in agreement. I sighed. "I better tack you up. I can't be late for the lesson."

I let go of his neck and turned. Just then Heather walked by, her arms full of Aristocrat's tack. She put it down on my trunk when she saw me. "What happened? I just saw Brit but she wouldn't say anything to me. Did something go down between you guys?"

I winced. "Something did." I told her everything, starting from the diary and ending at my failed apology attempt.

Heather covered her mouth. "Oh my god. So everything was fake? Brit didn't want to...you know..."

"Yeah. And I just accused her of stealing my boyfriend, when…"

"…it was the exact opposite," Heather finished for me. "I can't believe it. I really thought—"

"So did I," I told her. "It all made perfect sense at the time. Now that I know the truth, I was thinking I saw it all wrong because I'm so insecure and possessive of Jacob. Maybe it's because I just am—"

"No." Heather shook her head vigorously. "It isn't your fault. It did seem like that at the time. Even I thought she was a boy-snatcher, remember?"

"Only because I made it seem that way," I argued.

"Look at the evidence you knew. She spent time with Jacob. Andy was hurt. It all pointed to Brit at the time. But now that you know the truth, you need to stop hating on yourself. She made it seem that way. It isn't your fault."

The way Heather said it, I wanted to believe her. Just…

"I still said what I said. I told her she was a one-night-stand girl and that she was a lying cheater." I winced. "Imagine how she must've felt."

Heather grimaced. "Okay, you do need to apologize for that."

"I know."

We stood there like statues until Heather grabbed her tack. "We need to stop doing this. I'm not a shrink. And I'm not missing out on our lesson either."

"Same," I said. Charm nudged me and I put on a brave face. "C'mon, guy. Let's do this poo."

Ten minutes later Charm was tacked, groomed, and ready to go. I led him down into the indoor arena. My teammates were already here, circling and warming up their horses. I watched as Callie walked Blackjack in spirals, Jack looking supple and gleaming.

"Okay, girls," said Mr. Conner. He had been upgraded to one crutch. "Since I still cannot ride, I have asked Doug to take you girls out for some cross country." He gestured to Doug, who trotted in on a school horse named Shasta. "It's simple stuff, some hills for stamina and a short stretch up in the woods. You ready?"

"Definitely," Heather said, catching the protective vest Doug tossed her.

I sneaked a glance at Brit. She seemed to be intently focused on the vest straps and wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Have a nice time, girls," Mr. Conner told us, limping out.

We followed Doug out of the arena and down the school's driveway. A low fog hid the horses' hooves from sight. He unlocked the gate to the property on the other side and waited till we had all entered before relocking it.

"Okay, girls," he said, facing the YENT team. "The mist is low the ground to day, so we should be safe. Watch for rising fog to see the hills. We don't want anyone's horse to be exhausted when we reach the woods, so keep them at a fast canter. Stop at the woods. All clear?" Doug scanned us.

"Clear," Callie answered.

"Great," he told us, turning Shasta around and cantering off. Her gray coat was a few shades darker than the fog. I urged Charm after him, focusing on Heather's bobbing blond ponytail in front of me.

Frost kicked up from Aristocrat's hooves, so I slowed to increase the space between us. The first hill rose up in front of me, so I increased Charm's pace a bit.

It was like that for a while. I listened to the rhythmic beat of the five horses' hooves as we galloped over pale gray hills. Finally, I spotted the woods.

I slowed Charm to a walk and wrapped my scarf tighter around me. I heard Callie stop behind me.

"All right," Doug said. Shasta's neck had darkened despite the cold, but she still looked okay. "Feel the horses to see if they're too hot. Does anyone need to go back?"

I felt Charm's neck and shook my head. It had darkened from sweat but he looked fine, pawing the ground anxiously.

"Callie, you'll go first," Doug told us. "Then Sasha, Brit, and Heather. If you are in trouble, know that another rider is behind you. Heather, if we don't see you after Sasha exits the course, I'll come back for you. I'll be taking Mr. Conner's shortcut to the other side. Count to a hundred before you come next. Callie, you may go."

Callie squeezed her legs against Jack's sides, and he set off at a canter toward the woods. Doug followed her.

We waited for a period of silence. I tried to catch Brit's eye a few times, but he didn't see it and I didn't have the courage to ride up and tap her shoulder. Finally Heather broke the silence.

"You can probably go now," she told me. I nodded and asked Charm for a fast canter. He sprang forward and cantered swiftly down the trail.

I spotted a fallen log blocking our path. I counted down strides. _Three, two, one, and up! _Charm leapt cleanly over the log and kept going.

We jumped two more logs and a large gray rock covered with moss. I pulled on the reins, and we cantered around a bend in the trail. Trees cast dark shadows on the trail and I spotted the next obstacle only strides ahead.

I got into the two-point position and Charm jumped over a bale of rain-darkened hay. We reached the bank of the creek, and Charm trotted down the softer ground. I leaned back to keep my balance. He splashed through and climbed up the opposite bank.

We jumped another log and cantered up a small rise. When we reached the top I could see Callie and Doug waiting on the other side of three obstacles.

_Three more, Sasha. Come on. _I silently counted strides to the water-filled ditch. Charm leaped over it like it was barely bigger than a teaspoon. _Two. More. _I could feel Charm's breathing getting heavier, but he still gave it his all. He jumped a peeling brown fence, not even coming close to nicking the rail, and started toward the last blockage—an ivy-covered trellis. I could feel him speeding up, wanting to get to the other horses.

_Not. Happening. _I did a half-halt, and Charm listened and slowed. Just in time—the trellis was approaching. I got into position, and a second later Charm propelled himself up and over the ivy.

_Yes! _ I pulled him to a trot, and then a walk. That had been so fun! He was panting, copper coat darker from sweat, but he nickered proudly.

"You were so good out there," I told him, rubbing his foamy neck.

"Nice job, Sasha," Doug told me, smiling. "I watched the last jump especially. Mr. Conner told me about Charm and last jumps. You did perfectly."

"Thank you," I said, beaming from the praise.

"Good job," Callie told me quietly. I stared at her, surprised.

"Thanks," I replied.

We watched as Brit appeared over the rise. She and Apollo took the last three jumps like pros. She rode over to us, and Doug complimented her as well. Then we sat in silence as Heather approached.

She and Aristocrat made it look _so_ easy. They leaped the ditch and the fence, Aristocrat's mane and tail flowing in the breeze. They neared the trellis, and Heather asked Aristocrat for more rein. He had to be tired, but he still increased his speed. They jumped the trellis, looking like the models I'd seen in _Horse and Rider. _It wasn't fair.

Heather trotted Aristocrat over, and Doug had nothing but praise. Then we turned the horses away from the course and cantered them back to the stable.

Once Charm was cool, dry, and safely in his stall, I pulled out my phone.

_To: Brit Chan_

_ From: Sasha Silver_

_ Could you meet me at the SS in ten? I really need 2 talk._

I sent it. Minutes later I got a response.

_To: Sasha Silver_

_ From: Brit Chan_

_ K_

One letter. She must be really mad at me. I didn't blame her.

When I got to the Sweet Shoppe, Brit was already sitting in the corner table near the window. I made my way toward her.

"Hey." My voice was soft.

"Hi." Brit looked up at me. "I already ordered ice cream for both of us. I hope that's okay."

"It is." I took a seat in front of her.

We sat there as the ice cream came, and didn't touch it.

"Brit—"

"Sasha—"

We'd both spoken at the same time. She motioned for me to go first.

"I'm really sorry for everything I said to you back there." I tried to remember what I'd read about good apologies. "It was totally my mistake. I thought you were with Jacob and I was so, so, _so_ wrong. Just because I was, like, insecure or thought that you were together—I read your texts. And your diary." I ducked my head in shame. "It's—really wrong and embarrassing, and I shouldn't have done that. I hope you can forgive me. I was being insecure, and stupid, and blind, and just because I heard some seventh-graders gossip doesn't mean that I—that you were—never mind. I even stalked you once. Looking back, I was so stupid. I just wanted to say I'm sorry for everything and I didn't mean anything I said in the dorm. You aren't a liar; you're the best friend I've ever had."

I cut off my monologue, cheeks blazing. It all sounded a hundred time worse coming out of my mouth. I tensed, waiting for her to get up and leave and never speak to me again.

Instead, I heard laughter.

I looked up. Brit was doubled up, hand over her mouth, laughing. "Omigod—you really—oh that is—hahaha!"

"What?" I asked her.

"You—stalked me? And Jacob? I—ow—my stomach—hurts—" She kept laughing her head off. "That sounds—so—creepy—"

And then I couldn't help it. I burst out laughing. The barista looked at over at us, her expression part confused, part weirded out. And that just made us laugh harder.

When we finally calmed down, gasping, I finally got up the courage to ask her. "So you're not mad?"

Brit took a deep breath and stifled a giggle. "Not so much. I mean, the first time you said what you did I was really hurt by it. But then I realized—it must have looked that way when Jacob and I were secretly planning. I mean, sneaking out, lying about science…it did look like we were secretly dating, right? But don't worry." She patted my shoulder. "I would never steal your boyfriend."

"Yeah. I'm really sorry. You know I didn't mean anything I told you back there right? I mean—looking back—"

"I understand." Brit nodded.

"Hug?"

"Hug."

I got up and hugged her. And that's how I apologized. Because my life is like a cliché fanfiction.


	18. Like The First Date

**Okay here's the REAL chapter 18! The other one was just a teaser—I wouldn't actually make Jacob gay. **

**Lots of Jasha fluff in this chapter. Like, lots. Prepare for cliche wonderland. **

**This is the last chapter so yea. Enjoy! The story is ovah after this...my baby's finally grown up!**

**jk**

**So read and comment my pumpkins!**

**-MuseGoddess**

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><p>The Real Chapter Eighteen<p>

Like The First Date

Walking back to Orchard with Brit after our meeting at the Sweet Shoppe, I felt better than I had in weeks. I had a bestie again. I still had a loyal boyfriend. Everything was as it should be.

My phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out and checked the screen. One BBM message.

_Jacob S: Hey Sash! U free 2moro?_

_Sasha S: Yea why?_

_Jacob S: I'd like 2 take u out somewhere. B4 break._

_Sasha S: 3 that._

_Jacob S: Meet me stable at 10 2moro. Can't wait 2 cu._

_Sasha S: Can't wait 2 cu 2._

I exited out of BBM, feeling like I was floating on a cloud.

"Oh, you're date's going to be perfect. I should be a date planner." Brit smiled beside me.

"Can I get a preview?" I teased her.

"No. That will ruin everything!" She grinned, and I laughed. It felt so good to have my BFF back.

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><p>The next morning I slept in until nine since we had no classes—it was the last day before break started. I woke up and saw Brit was standing at our window, peering out at the sky.<p>

"Hey," I said.

"Hey," she replied. "This is perfect. I couldn't have planned it better myself."

"What?" I asked, pushing past her to stare out the window. The grounds were bustling, full of students getting ready for the five days we had off. But what really surprised me was the sun. The sky was a cloudless blue, and the sun hung in the sky shedding warmth over Canterwood. The sun wasn't so strong, but at least it was there.

"Perfect for your date," Brit smiled.

"Could you please, _please_ tell me a just little bit about it?" I begged Brit.

"Nope." She shook her head. We better head to the caf before all the good muffins are gone."

I pulled on a crisp white tee and gray skinny jeans, brushed my teeth and braided my hair back. The weak sun felt like a new beginning.

The caf was halfway filled with Canterwood students. I grabbed two poppyseed muffins and Brit took two chocolate chunk ones. We both grabbed cups of cranberry juice before joining the Trio at their usual table.

"I see you've made up now," Heather observed as we took our seats.

I nodded. Alison smiled at me across the table.

We talked and chatted through breakfast. Heather looked oddly pale.

"You're meeting Troy's parents today?" I guessed.

"Yeah." She swirled the milk inside her glass. "After this. It's so stupid to be nervous but maybe they won't like me. Maybe—"

"Of course they'll like you," Brit assured her firmly. "Don't worry."

Heather regained a bit of color. "Are you—can you be—and I still need to tell my parents about Troy. How am I supposed to do that?"

It was unnerving to see Heather this way. Kind of like seeing your favorite star without any makeup. I was used to seeing Heather confident and cocky, like I was used to seeing airbrushed Britney.

"It's okay. One thing at a time. You don't have to tell your dad right now, right? Focus on meeting Troy's parents." I told her.

Her face cleared. "Right," she repeated. "I don't have to tell him right this second."

After breakfast Brit and I headed back to the dorm. Brit looked at me while unlocking out door. "You better start getting ready, it's almost ten."

I could feel my stomach in my throat. "Oh my god! What do I do first?"

"You shower," Brit told me, gently propelling me toward the bathroom. "Then I'll do your hair and makeup." She started rummaging through my closet.

"Okay." I went inside and locked the door.

I used three times the regular amount of strawberry vanilla body wash before rinsing, and filled my hand with half a handful—way too much—of shampoo and deep conditioner. I was nervous, okay? I had no idea what to expect.

I stepped out of the bathroom in my pink terry cloth robe. Brit blew out my hair until it settled, soft and shiny, around my shoulders. Then she sprayed leave-in conditioner on my layers.

"Here," Brit told me, handing me some clothes. I pulled on fawn colored-breeches, a cute purple blouse with lace, and riding boots. Then Brit did my makeup. She started with tinted moisturizer that evened out my skin tone. Peachy blush outlined my cheekbones. She lined my eyes in dark gray eyeliner, bringing out the gold flecks in my eyes, and swiped some candy-pink gloss on my lips.

"Okay," Brit told me, dusting a coffee-tinted brush on my eyelid. "You're all set."

"Wow," I breathed, staring at my reflection. "Brit, you're a miracle worker."

"I know," she said. "Good luck, though you so don't need it."

I pocketed my phone and hugged her again. Watching her beam at me, I couldn't believe that I'd ever thought she was a boy-snatcher. I shook my head. How could I have been so naïve?

"Oh wait, Sasha!" Brit blurted suddenly.

"Yeah?" I turned around so fast I was sure I had whiplash.

"Remember to act surprised. You aren't supposed to know about the date," Brit told me, giggling.

"Oh, right. I will."

I walked out of Orchard and felt the all-too-familiar boyfriend butterflies begin to settle in my stomach. It felt weird to walk to the stable in fancy clothes with makeup. I prayed that Charm wouldn't sneeze on my blouse or kick mud at Jacob or something.

As I neared the stable, I spotted Jacob and my nerves melted into a smile. After all, what was there to worry about? I was going to spend my last day in Canterwood with my two favorite guys—Jacob and Charm.

"Hey," he said as I reached him, and he took my hand. "You look amazing."

"Thanks. You do too." I smiled at him, taking in his blue shirt and black breeches. Remembering Brit's reminder, I said, "So why are we at the stable? Was it just to say hi to Charm?" I teased, squeezing his hand.

"A bit more than that. Let me show you something." He led me inside. We reached Charm's stall, and I saw my horse and a school horse named Clark cross-tied side-by-side, all tacked up. A wicker picnic basket sat on my tack trunk.

"I hope you don't mind that I tacked Charm up," he said.

"No, it's okay. Wait—you tacked Charm up?" I looked at him in surprise.

"I wanted you to have the perfect last day," he said, brushing a curl back from my forehead. He let go of my hand and held out his arms. "Sasha Silver, would you like to go on a trail ride with me?"

I beamed. "I'd love to."

He helped me up onto Charm, then grabbed the basket and swung himself up easily onto Clark. I watched him, quietly astounded. "You know, you might want to consider an equestrian career. You're a natural."

He blushed, his lightly pink cheeks contrasting adorably with is brown hair. "Aw, thanks. But I had lots of help. And I figured, I couldn't be so afraid of horses if I was going to be with the great rider Sasha Silver."

He always knew what to say. I held his hand for a second. "Thanks."

"Ready?" He swung Clark around.

"Always." I followed him out of the stable and down a dirt trail. We let the horses amble along at an easy walk, enjoying the barely-there breeze and clear sun. I rubbed Charm's neck and he bobbed his head.

"It's a beautiful day," I told Jacob, after a few minutes of comfortable silence.

"It is beautiful," he agreed. I looked over and blushed when I saw that his gaze was on me.

We rode along the unfamiliar trail—I hadn't ridden it before. Soon, it opened up onto a grassy green field with a single tree growing in the center, spreading its falling red leaves to make a small umbrella of shade. A small green plaid picnic blanket was spread underneath.

I halted Charm. "Oh Jacob…it's amazing."

He slid off Clark, tied him up, and helped me down off Charm. I tickled his muzzle before tying him up under the tree beside Clark. Always hungry, he bent his head down immediately to grab a bite of grass.

I laughed and walked beside Jacob, sitting beside him the picnic blanket. It was all so special, with the warm sun and the cool breeze and the peaceful meadow. I told Jacob so.

He looked at me. "You're special, Sasha. I wanted to make you feel like that, because you deserve it."

I snuggled into his shoulder. "I can't believe you did this all for me."

"Well, Brit helped." I tensed a little at that, remembering our fight and tried not to focus on the guilty feelings swimming around in me. "But I wanted this to be perfect."

"Anything with you is perfect," I said, smiling up at him.

His arm tightened comfortably around me. "Would you like a sandwich?"

"Of course." I took one and bit into it. Jacob deftly unpacked the rest of the basket.

We sat there, staring up at the sky and talking about everything from people to games to horses, eating our way through the treats, snacks, and drinks Jacob had packed. Finally, when the first clouds began to slide over the sun, he sat up and looked at me. "I have something for you."

My mouth opened in surprise. "Really? Oh—I didn't—"

He smiled gently. "It's okay." He pulled a black box from the basket and handed it to me. I slid off the ribbon and eased off the lid. Inside, on a cushion of cotton, lay a beautiful gold heart-shaped locket inlaid with a pink rhinestone _S._

"Oh, Jacob…" I couldn't speak. "It's beautiful."

"You're beautiful." Jacob held out his hand. "May I?"

"Of course." I handed him the necklace.

He took it and fastened it around my neck. Electricity arched through my body when his fingers brushed my skin. It felt cool on my skin and hung gently around my neck.

He took the pendant in his fingers. "Open it."

I pried open the locket and smiled. Inside were two pictures—one of Charm and one of Jacob. "I—it's so—" I was lost for words. Instead I just leaned over and kissed him.

When I pulled away he said, "I have something else for you."

"What?" I shook my head, my guilt-o-meter exploding to bits. "Jacob, you shouldn't have—"

"It's okay, just something small." He gave me a little red box. I opened it and found a small orange leaf charm, outlined in gold.

I fastened it on, where it swung gently next to my silver horse charm. "Thank you, Jacob. This was too much."

"Nothing is too much for you." He stared intently at me. My heart sped up as he took my face in his broad, warm hand. Butterflies started dancing in my stomach as he leaned in. His lips pressed gently to mine, and I felt warmth spreading through me from the place where his lips touched mine.

When he pulled away, I sighed and went up for one last long kiss.

The End


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